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How are you supposed to feel?

Space Ghost

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when the person that breaks up with you now feels like we never had anything and everything was just a lie.



i read a survey bulletin she posted on myspace contained the info that she was crushing on someone at college already (after she told me the reason we broke up is because she did NOT want a bf now and for a long while, now making it seem like that was a lie.) Another question on that survey was have you ever been really in love. her answer....now that i think about it, no.


i promptly sent her a message full of some pretty nasty things (which i know i didn't mean, it was just out of anger) and deleted her from my friends.


It seems like she has forgotten all the fun times we had, and it just seems like a big lie to me now.


So pretty much it feels like I've had my heart ripped out all over again.....what sucks even more is that i was pretty close to being over the breakup.


thoughts from the fine folks at enotalone?



edit: i just looked at all my old threads...which were all started about her....i got kinda teary to see our empire go from the build up to the teardown....

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This reminds me of your previous post - I think it was about the same girl - who the night after she broke up with you she finds on your phone messages from some girl and it looks like you are moving on already. Then she is hurt and throwing your phone around because she felt everything was a lie since you're already talking to new girls.


She probably hasn't forgotten the fun times, but really when you're trying to justify things to yourself you're not going to go around admitting things that may make you wrong!

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I said stuff like that after my boyfriend had dumped me to be honest...he'd insisted that he wanted to be single for a bit, but I found out later he had a new girlfriend (whether he'd cheated on me or not is still a mystery), so whenever I did surveys I always ended up answering stuff like that. I didn't forget any of the good times (though I have to admit, the messy end of the relationship kind of tainted them anyway), it was just my way of showing the world that I was moving on. Maybe this is just what she's trying to do?

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when the person that breaks up with you now feels like we never had anything and everything was just a lie.....


Well, you're both young...but you should know that people of every age say things like this. It's more of them trying to convince themselves what they did was right, more than anything else.


There are people who end a relationship and feel completely comfortable with the decision, there are no lingering doubts, and the feelings that are still there are not all that strong.


on the other hand, you have some people who feel quite conflicted about breaking up with someone, they feel guilty that they hurt a person they cared very deeply for - and in most cases, loved at one time - and so they look for anything they can to ease the conflict in their mind.


Sometimes, the easiest way to do this is try and convince themselves (and others) that they never really loved the person anyway.

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