What Is Going On With Me???

[ScenicBoy]

It's been almost six months since the end of an intense six month relationship. The first couple of months were quite difficult, but I got through it. I learned a lot about myself and I made changes inside and out. I still have things I'd like to change, but not much on the inside.

 

We've seen each other once since the split in early March; no contact other than that. I still think about her, but it hasn't been that big of a deal. I've been focusing on my life, having fun, meeting people, etc. I know that I am better off without the ex-girlfriend as long as she is not healthy. Sad to say, but I'm ok with that.

 

I've had several first dates over the past few months and felt like I've moved on. I started dating someone ~10 days ago. I really like her, but not much desire/lust/excitement has developed yet. I'm beginning to wonder if I'm more damaged than I thought and am "blocking" or protecting myself in some way. She's growing on me, but I don't want to rip this woman's clothes off and I think I should at least want to. (Of course, I don't mean this in a criminal way)

 

To make matters more fun, this week has suddenly been very difficult and I have no idea why. I really am missing my ex-girlfriend the past few days. It's messing with me big time. There hasn't been any change in anything that I know of. She does have a new male friend - strictly plutonic - but that doesn't bother me in the slightest.

 

One other weird thing this week...I have this strange feeling that something is about to happen with all of this....like I'm nervous. No idea what or why.

 

I'm really pretty normal but I'm beginning to think I'm losing it. LOL Argh!! Why am I suddenly missing her so much again? Why the weird feeling? Why? Why?

 

Any insight would be great....

[stranded247]

I think this is more normal than you realise. You miss her because you don't have and you don't have the security of a relationship. Your out in the open now and while that is mostly fun when you've been in a relationship its always a little daunting to step back into the world alone and be like every other single person. It sounds like you are honestly better off without her and I think you will find that this feeling of missing her will pass pretty quickly. What would help it pass even faster is if you make a point of going out more and keeping busy. I find its a lot easier to miss someone when your alone with nothing to do because that is when you would probably have callen your ex up. The solution to this is to just call someone else up, run errands, do whatever you enjoy most and just fill the time until eventually you will find you can be alone and not miss her anymore.

[ahop]

I'm in the exact same mind set. Had an intense 7 month relationship end about 4 months ago. Haven't seen her in 3 months or spoken to her since then. Things have improved for me over the last month and I've even met another girl that I've just started started to see, don't know if I'm ready for that. And now over the past 5 days I've been really missing her badly. To the point that I'm tempted to break NC.

 

I've been so strong up to this point I can't cave now.. breaking down would only make things worse.. Maybe it's the fact that you are actually moving on with life that makes the thoughts come back.. Almost like you got so used to the pining and misery that now that things are changing, it's kind of shocking and all those feelings come flooding back for a short time ( hopefully short time )

[atelis]

i know that when i broke up with an ex a few years back, i took it very hard indeed. whenever i would meet someone new, i would back off because i didn't want to lose the feeling of love i had for my ex and give those feelings to someone new. maybe i was still hoping we would get back or maybe i just didn't want to lose the feeling i had for my ex, but it definitely held me back

[photogo]

Maybe it is the experience itself. I beaten myself hard for an ex that moved on while we were in argument phase. She would go to parties and not answer my calls and i would find out the * * * * she done there. Now, another break up just occur about a month now and I don't cry over it. This relationship was way intense than the ex i mention above.

 

so your mind gets accustom to the feeling. If you are feeling like this, it probably mean you should still stay single or you can take it slow and talk to this new girl to create rapport. I talked to a girl i liked for 4 months before i ask her out cuz i am for sure i am in love with her...even if we aren't together