Lyan08 Posted August 27, 2008 Share Posted August 27, 2008 I would HATE to be involved with a guy who had an ex-wife and/or kids. I just think it can make things complicated. But I know some people don't have this particular hang-up. I am pregnant and have been dumped by the father. I have 2 older children who have a great relationship with their father. I'm not looking for somebody to "raise" my kids. I'm wondering what are the chances of me finding a husband who will love all my kids and want to legally adopt my youngest (whose father wants me to put her up for adoption). That would get the biological father out of the picture, I guess. I just want to get on with my life. This baby girl was unexpected, but there is no way I'd give her away, yet I want her to have a father who loves her. And I really hate to be tied for the rest of my life to the baby's dad. He wants no involvement with me whatsoever. The baby isn't here yet and I guess there is a chance he'll change his mind about her once she gets here, but I have about decided that I'd rather he NOT be involved simply because he seems to have such an intense dislike for me and has spent so much time wishing this problem would disappear. I can't imagine him losing the resentment he has for me since I didn't have the abortion he wanted me to have at first. And I keep thinking he isn't worthy of her, anyway. It took me a few weeks to adjust to the idea of being pregnant with a guy who had no intention of marrying me, and I hoped for a miscarriage, but I want her now. I think my ideal scenario would be to find a guy who wanted to only be a part-time husband and father. I'd rather not live with a guy while my oldest kids are still at home. Maybe a 40 year old guy (or older), set in his ways who just wants a family connection (but not the daily drudgery) and a companion and sex partner who will stay with him the rest of his life. I'm very devoted and I have a lot of love, admiration, appreciation, and affection to give to somebody who wants it. I am starting to think that anyone who hasn't married by age 40 has something wrong with him, though. Otherwise, wouldn't he have already been snapped up? Link to comment
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