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K i've gone through all the steps that i think im suppose to on this site except for letting go. I've been giving her, her space(even though she calls me up sometimes to go and hang out and sleep over). I've forgiven her for the things that she has done to me and i have forgiven myself for the things that i have done in the relationship. We where dating for 2 years have been broken up for about 3 months (she moved out nov 20th). The thing is we both still love eachother but we both no that where not right for eachother. She says that she needs to be alone and she would like to date other people (or if someone came along she would like to have the option to date them).

So we have been apart for a while and she has had guys sleep over at her place (well one guy that is like a best bud) she says that nothing happened. When she told me that this other guy slept over i got insanly jealous and was asking like 20 questions.

Meanwhile i've been seeing someone else for about a week now. So i guess the question is how do i let her go and stop getting mad when i find out shes hanging out with other guys or some guy sleeps over.

I mean i started to think about all my ex's and them being with someone else and i though"good for them i hope they have found someone new" but with my resent ex. I basically never want her to find anyone else or be with anyone else(which is totaly unrealistic).

So please i need help on letting her completely go...

(i almost feel like a phsyco thinking if she can't be with me she shouldn't be with anyone else)

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well thats a tough one. i think i would be totally mad if my ex bf had girls sleeping over. why can you say you love eachother , but aren't right for eachother. just wondering, that just doesn't make any sense to me. well if you need to talk pm me.

love ya,


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Well it sounds like you are still on the "Stop Fighting" step. Remember, "what your ex is doing is no longer your concern". I think you should maybe take a break from talking to your ex for awhile. Then you won't feel as if her exploits with other men is being thrown in your face. You'll still wonder about it, but at least you won't have to see it.


Tell her its too painful to talk to her right now. Its just too difficult to be friends with your ex when you haven't healed from the breakup. Focus on that first. And then try the friendship.

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