can it ever be the same...?

[woahisme13]

We broke up about almost 3 months ago. She started dating someone else. They broke up about 3 weeks ago. 2 weeks ago she texted me saying she was really hurting and she really cared about her ex alot. I told her she needed to leave me alone and I didn't care about her and her ex, and the fact that she needed to tell me that was messed up.

 

This past Saturday I was out at a show. She came and stood by my side the whole time. I ignored her all night. Sunday a mutaul friend invited me over to play cards. It was me my friend another friend and my ex. I had a good time, suprisingly.

 

Yesterday she texted me to see if I wanted to go to her place and watch a movie "as friends" at 11:00 at night. I told her I was busy bt maybe today or tomorow....

 

I definitly miss the times we had together. But after all we have been through since the breakup ( check out my other posts to find out about the messy drama) I don't think I can feel the same way about her that I did when we were together. I don't think it could be the same again.

 

But, as I said beofre I do miss her. For the first month after the breakup I wanted nothing more than to be with her, now I'm not so sure.

 

Can a relationship work out after a nasty breakup?

[Steve 7745]

The Great Gatsby thought much the same.

 

Even if it can be the same, it shouldn't. If you repeat the past, you'll make the same mistakes again. Hence, something has to change to make things work.

 

You don't want it to be the same. It didn't work then, and if things are the same, it won't work now. Trust me.

[riley123]

From reading your post I get the sense that you don't miss her as much as you miss the closeness of a relationship.

 

I agree that some of the things she has done (contact you about her ex) are messed up.

 

Spare yourself anymore undo pain. Tell her you can’t be her friend right now, go no contact and heal yourself.

 

Take care.

[Mutley]

I congratulate you on the awsome job your doing at keeping this chick at bay.

 

You have a tremendous amount of guts.

 

To answer your question...sadly we can never go home again.

[jettison]

I congratulate you on the awsome job your doing at keeping this chick at bay.

 

You have a tremendous amount of guts.

 

To answer your question...sadly we can never go home again.

 

Patently untrue. My parents remarried each other after 3.5 years apart, post "nasty breakup". They've been together for 20 more years. In this life, what happens it pretty much what you believe will happen.

[Mutley]

Patently untrue. My parents remarried each other after 3.5 years apart, post "nasty breakup". They've been together for 20 more years. In this life, what happens it pretty much what you believe will happen.

 

Exception rather than the rule.

 

You can't say it any other way.

 

How many more tried and failed?

[sine]

To answer your question...sadly we can never go home again.

 

i say this as an addition to what you're saying, but why would anyone want to? i think it's a good thing. i miss my ex-of course, but i wouldn't want things to be the same. i would want them to be different! that's what we're all hoping for, or at least i'd hope so!!!

 

i'd rather be without her and have change than be with her & go back to what got us to where we are now, so...

[Mutley]

i say this as an addition to what you're saying, but why would anyone want to? i think it's a good thing. i miss my ex-of course, but i wouldn't want things to be the same. i would want them to be different! that's what we're all hoping for, or at least i'd hope so!!!

 

i'd rather be without her and have change than be with her & go back to what got us to where we are now, so...

 

YES and Amen!!!

[jettison]

Exception rather than the rule.

 

You can't say it any other way.

 

How many more tried and failed?

 

That's the point. There are exceptions to the rules. That's why universal statements don't hold a lot of weight.

 

"Will we get back together?"

 

"No, you won't."

 

... as if said by a psychic. I think that everyone already realizes how difficult it is though.

[Mutley]

That's the point. There are exceptions to the rules. That's why universal statements don't hold a lot of weight.

 

True. There are many random factors in life.