The old best friend ordeal.

[Pustulio]

Well I had to get this out somehow. It's probably been asked a million times before, but there is this girl who is basically my closest friend of that gender.

I have been close friends with her for about 5 years now, we can talk about any subject and we are very comfortable around each other. Her and her brother are the only two people that I can visit and cheer me right up no matter how bad I'm feeling.

 

Anyway, ever since we have been hanging out multiple times a week, for months, I have developed a strong liking for her. Every part of who she is and what she stands for is utterly beautiful to me. In my eyes, she looks stunning no matter where she is or what state she is in. Her personality is strikingly similar to mine, even though we don't have everything in common when it comes to interest.

I'm pretty bad when it comes to picking up signs from the opposite sex (as every girlfriend I've had reminded time and time again so I don't really know what to think. She could be sending off signs.. Like when we talk about sex. Whatever discussion it may be on the subject, she always tells me that the way I go about it is exactly what she wants in a male. even when its just relationship talk, whatever I seem to explain to her seems exactly what she wants. Or the other night when we were at a party (both wasted, I must say) she said to me "I love you, more than I can explain now". I don't know whether that's she loves me as a friend heaps, its something she wants to tell me or just plain wasted talk. (but I don't expect you guys to figure that one out for me Just little things like that scattered around conversation that I cant distinguish if its my emotions telling me what I want to hear, or not.

 

I know that if she did feel the same way as I do now, she's not going to make the first move. So its either me seek an answer about these feelings of mine, or move on.

 

Its really touchy when it comes to friends as close as this, because it could go either really good, or really bad. There's no way I want to risk the awesome friendship we have, but I cant go on feeling this way without some sort of closure one way or another. Its starting to get in the way of normal thought.

I know if I say something and it turns out she doesn't feel the same way, our friendship wont be the same as it is now, even if its just slightly.

 

How the * * * * can I get closure on this without screwing up everything I hold dear to me right now?

If you need more info, just ask.

Sorry for it being long.. but if this isn't done right, then.. That's a very bad thing

 

Thanks in advance for any advice..