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Please read slowly, this is confusing

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1998 - I meet Brandy, we hang out, start dating, she gets pregnant, we have a son, we get married.


2000 - Brandy and I move from NY to SC because I love the south.


2001 - Brandy and our son move back to NY, because we can't get along.


2002 - I meet Wanda, who has 2 kids, we hook up.


2003 - 2008 - Wanda is a psycho, we don't get along at all, if it's not her way, it's hell to live with, her ideas are right no matter what, I'm the fault of everything bad that happens, blah blah blah, you get the point. Wanda leaves in April of 2008 and buys her own house. The kids are not mine physically, but they are mine if you know what I'm saying. "Real" dad is dead, killed his GF and himself, real piece of work. We decide to get back together about 2 months later. I'm trying to conform to all the things she didn't like about me, but she is the same. At this point, I'm settling because I'm to old to get back into the "game" and find someone new, plus I'm in love with Danielle but can't have her (see below)


In the meantime I have met someone at work; Danielle. Danielle has been married for 16 years, but hasn't been happy. We hit it off and start a little office fling. No sex, just enjoying each other, holding, kissing, having the companionship and realizing we are perfect for each other. This goes on for about 7 months (yes, I was cheating on Wanda at this time). Danielle gets the big guilt trip and says this can't happen. Now, she still tells me she loves me and wants to be with me, but can't do anything about her situation at this time. To be honest, she's the type that will not go anywhere until her daughter is moved out, because she's not going to break up the family. I applaud her for that.


Back to Brandy; she and I have been 1000 miles apart now for 6 years. She's with someone and hates the relationship, and I'm with someone and hate the relationship. Brandy has someone that she wants to be with but won't commit, and I have Danielle, same situation. So anyway, Brandy and I talk about everything, like I said, we are best friends now.


Well, I went to NY in June to pick up our son to bring him down to SC for the summer, and she and I kind of hit it off again. We ended up kissing (she grabbed me and kissed me), holding hands, just enjoying each other again I guess. The same thing happened this weekend when I brought our son back, we were making out, touching, holding, etc. when no one was around and watching. She's not happy, I'm not happy, but we think we'd be happy together, if it weren't for the "people we want" .


Here's the dilema.....and I'd like to hear opinions on what I should do.


Wanda - I'm with her because I've been with her for 6 years, I love the kids, and don't want another "dad" to come into their lives. I don't love her, but I try to convince myself that I do, because she's here, in my face.


Danielle - Been married 16 years, probably not going anywhere for at least another 5 years until their daughter is out of the house. We both have separate lives, but are both in love with each other.


Brandy - We are still married (10 years now). She's in a screwed up relationship and so am I. We both agree that we still love each other and have grown a lot in the past few years. She's in NY and I'm in SC. I won't move to the north and she doesn't like the south.


OK, brutally honest please...let's hear it....



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Divorce Brandy -- since neither of you love each other enough to compromise on the living situation.


Break up with Danielle (no future. if she's not happy, she should get divorced, NOT cheat) and Wanda (she deserves to be with someone who loves her, as do you).

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Brandy- you two got married SOLEY because you had a child, seems like it. You should be more of a father to your son than to Wanda's kids that aren't all that much of yours. There is no way in hell this girl loves you, she may see it as that you two are already married.


Wanda- Your pulling an act because you don't care for her, you just feel sorry for her and you only want the relationship with the kids. NOT HER.


Danielle- Shes married, so basically ya should of NEVER had done anything, she cheated on her husband and shes being rather ridiculous. Its easier on a child the sooner the parents split. If shes not happy she shouldn't be sacrificing, her husband should have an equal chance to find someone who actually loves him.


YOU- you got issues, you need to get wanda out of your life. You definitely need Danielle out of your life. As for Brandy she should be nothing more than the mother of your son. As to why the hell are you still fn married is the stupidest thing in the world. You cheated on her multiple times. Get a divorce, jesus.


What a mess. You need to cut all ties with everyone cept your son, real son. Then be civil to Brandy, but not with her.

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