kishimoto Posted August 16, 2008 Share Posted August 16, 2008 this is a crappy rant. would appreciate any follow ranting from anybody else doing NC. i have posted my stories. finally came to the decision to go full NC. i realised today how much i need to. i missed called him yesterday because he had asked me to tell him when i found out about a certain gig (friend stuff). when he didnt get back to me within the hour a freaked out. thats not something FRIENDS do. so its clear i cant be his friend ....YET. its hard. i was doing so well. thought i was in controll but i wasnt. i miss him and it hurts. my friend just cancelled on me so i feel even crapper. nothing to do today now but hate myself and miss him. ARRRRRRRRRRRhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i'm so up and down. rant, rant, rant. how is everybody else feeling today? p.s my phone is on silent and is now my worst enemy sitting in the corner of my room mocking me. i hate my phone today . grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Link to comment
BrokenJoy Posted August 16, 2008 Share Posted August 16, 2008 hey kishimoto, glad that you made the decision to go NC, second part of the plan is sticking to it! As said before in other posts, what if you call and you get no reply? It will make your feelings worse Try as much as you can to stick to NC, occupy yourself with something, start a new hobby, read a book, watch a movie, listen to music, call up a friend, whatever works for you. If you need to take out your frustration, do so, punch a pillow, cry it out. I know NC isn't easy and you'll have good and bad days. Hang in there. If you have to urge to contact, ask yourself, what am I going to get out of it? If you're not in contact with him, he cannot hurt you anymore. Best of luck. Feel free to PM me Link to comment
kishimoto Posted August 16, 2008 Author Share Posted August 16, 2008 hey brokenjoy how is your NC going? thanks for the advice. i was suppose to go to a festival today but i can imagine what i will do. i will get drunk and show up at his place thinking he will be happy to see me and that i will be able to fix everything. i need to be strong. what method are you using at the moment? Link to comment
BrokenJoy Posted August 16, 2008 Share Posted August 16, 2008 hey brokenjoy how is your NC going? thanks for the advice. i was suppose to go to a festival today but i can imagine what i will do. i will get drunk and show up at his place thinking he will be happy to see me and that i will be able to fix everything. i need to be strong. what method are you using at the moment? Long story short, was in a 3 year relationship. Went NC for 1 month, then LC. But I realized now I have to go full NC. It's been a little over one and a half weeks of NC and I actually feel some progress on my 'healing' over the breakup. It's been just over 2 months since the breakup [can't believe it's been that long already]. Another thing I realized was that this 'healing/grieving' is going to take a longer time than I originally expected. You can do it kishimoto, hang in there =] In terms of what methods I'm using, in the first few days I felt a lot of anger so I would punch a pillow. I haven't cried for about 2 weeks now, and I don't feel the need to cry either so at least that wave has passed, or at least I hope so. I try to stay busy and have plans for the next day so I don't sit there and think about it, making myself feel worse. You have to do what works for you. Best of luck =] PM me if you need to Link to comment
LilBear Posted August 16, 2008 Share Posted August 16, 2008 p.s my phone is on silent and is now my worst enemy sitting in the corner of my room mocking me. i hate my phone today . grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr You might want to consider changing your number and not let him know. It gets your mind both off him and off the phone and actually helps you to get your life back a lil bit quicker too. That was I did and it helped me through months of NC. Link to comment
testcase Posted August 16, 2008 Share Posted August 16, 2008 Yea NC is tough but it really is important. For a while I went 3 months NC was feeling pretty darn good about myself then it happened. Call from the ex. Obviously this was huge I thought, debated turning the call... didn't turn here haha wish i did. I returned the call it was just to check up on me, realized it was no good now I'm back in NC. It feels like I'm starting all over. Just good luck remember you should know when you are in the clear. It is tough because everyone on here gives advice but ultimately you will make your own decisions. In my case after 3 months I knew I should have ignored the call but I think it would have eaten away at me so I returned it... now it is still eating away at me. =). Follow your NC it will get easier. Oh last advice I just thought up. It might be good to tell them about your wanting to go no contact to heal. Maybe that would change things if they call. In my situation it just kinda happened that I went NC, in the end I think it would have been good if they knew why I was doing it. So they would have respected it and not broken it unless it was important to them. Link to comment
kishimoto Posted August 16, 2008 Author Share Posted August 16, 2008 thanks testcase i did actually leave a message to let him know. i did this because i met him the day before and it appeared like we were going to stay friends. we talked about future things and doing stuff together so i just let him know that i needed to stop contact. he would have contacted me if i didnt let him know. i wanted to be honest like you said. if he contacts me now it will be because of something inportant. today has been hard but it is day one so its obvious it wouldnt be easy right. i feel fragile but from what i've heard. it gets easier. thankyou for the advice.xx Link to comment
kuhl282000 Posted August 16, 2008 Share Posted August 16, 2008 ARRRRRRRRRR You have a ways to go ....... Link to comment
kishimoto Posted August 17, 2008 Author Share Posted August 17, 2008 i have a long way to go but i woke up this morning realising i dont want him back. we didnt match. although he wasnt a bad guy. he was nice. he wasnt the one for me. i'm not gonna wait by the phone hoping he will call or text and tell me he has changed his mind. i dont have hope. i dont want to have hope its over its happens to people everyday i dont want him and he doesnt want me and thats fine Link to comment
kuhl282000 Posted August 17, 2008 Share Posted August 17, 2008 sounds like you know what you want ...... most people don't .....and yes the phone is in your purse ........well see if it rings ... Good Luck .... Link to comment
zenbabyk Posted August 17, 2008 Share Posted August 17, 2008 NC is so hard to do!! All I really have been able to do is work and sleep. When I try to go out with friends all I can do is keep checking my phone. It really sucks. It's weird. So weird. I hate being so close with someone and then all of a sudden not talking to them. Good luck... stay strong and listen to music!! Link to comment
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