whitney0818 Posted August 14, 2008 Share Posted August 14, 2008 I'm new here, and I just need some feedback from someone other than family and friends. My husband and I are both 23 years old, and have been married almost 3 years. He's in the Army, and has been gone more than he has been home since we have been married, but that has never been an issue up until now. Upon coming home from his recent deployment in March, I noticed him spending more time working on his car, playing paintball with friends, and going out drinking. I really didn't let that get to me, it does take time to readjust, and I was fine with that. Lately, we had been bickering over things such as finances and him never being home or wanting to spend any time with just me. I have always been the one to take care of bills, housework, and whatever needs that he may have. He has never gave me any indication he was unhappy. This past Friday he came home and was very distant. I asked him what was wrong he said 'nothing'. I know him better than that, so I asked him to be honest with me, because communication is key right? He said he wanted to take a drive with me, and we'd talk about it somewhere other then the house. My parents were in town that weekend, so he ddn't want them to be in he middle of it I guess. Well, when we were driving he stopped at a dead end road and took a deep breath and said he needed a break. I was honestly not shocked by this. I asked him if he wanted to just completely end this marriage (maybe I shouldn't have but I did), he said no. He said he was still in love with me, just needed some alone time. So, I said okay, and he dropped me back at the house and left for a friends. Over the weekend I had no contact with him. Sunday night comes around and he text me that he's coming to the house to get clothes. I said okay, and asked if we could talk. He said he wasn't sure. I was like okay, that's fine, but we do need to talk about this eventually. And then he said "I'm done, I can't do this anymore." I am honestly confused. For a man to change so quickly, I only feel like there is something more to this than what he wants me to know. I even asked if he was cheating on me, and he said he wasn't. He said he just wasn't happy at the moment. He said he loved me, but was falling out of love with me. I don't know what to think. He won't talk to me, other then text me to ask how our DOG is. That makes me mad. It seems like all he is concerned about is the DOG. He's put me in a big predicament. I can't live in the house, and I have no one in this town. I quit my job and moved back to my parents home because of this. We just bought a brand new home a year ago, and a new vehicle a month ago. He says he doesn't want the car, but wants to keep the house. I had one more semester of school left down there, and now if I want to be able to finish I have to commute 4.5 hours each way, two times a week. I'm at a loss. I know this hasn't even been a week yet since this happened, but I just needed to get an outsiders opinion. I've already went to talk to a lawyer, and he told me to not rush into anything. I guess my biggest issue is that he always told me if things got so bad that he or I wanted to leave, that we'd seek marital counseling. I asked him if he wanted to do that, his response was no. What should I do? I don't communicate with him unless he text me. We have talked once on the phone and he was in a rush to figure out what to do with the household items. It's like he's trying so hard to move on from this so quick, and it hurts. Thanks for your time.... Link to comment
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