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Romantic feelings and friends...?

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I'm in my mid-twenties and have been friends with Tim for 5 years now. I met him in college. When we first met it was obvious that he approached me because he was attracted to me. I was young and naive and nothing ever happened back then... But to make that portion short, I ended up falling for him years ago anyway! Since then, we've become best friends. And I'm still in love with him. We have hooked up on various occastions, but we never broach that subject because I think we both have a silent mutual agreement not to jeopardize the friendship. A few months ago I started to suspect that he was developing feelings for me again. However, I moved in with him a few weeks ago because he BEGGED me to move in with him! Now Nothing sexual has happened between us since though. There are times when I'm convinced that he has feelings for me, and I know I'm probably the most important female in his life... BUT my problem is he messes around with other girls, a LOT! And he's always been a flirt, which is part of the reason I never voiced my feelings for him. With all that's happened between us, I'm just wondering if he's just as confused as I am and thinks that I just view him as a friend!? I NEVER show my romantic feelings towards him at all. And pretend like I don't give a damn when other girls are over. So is it possible that's why he fools around with a bunch of seemingly meaningless girls? Or maybe the regulars aren't meaningless? And It recently seems like he tries to gage my reactions when other chicks are around, to see if I'm getting pissed or jealous. Because neither one of us are the type to be open with our emotions. So my question is... How can I tell if he does (even possibly) have feelings for me? Is he just confused by me, as I am him? And with the whole living together situation now, if I finally do decide to tell him after all these years how I feel, how could I do that??! Thanks so much in advance! Any response is much appreciated!

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Its a big leap from friendship to dating and once you confess your feelings your friendship will never be the same. Its a risk and you really have to evaluate how worth it, it is. The thing is, living with someone when there is a lot of obvious sexual tension is difficult. In a way I think you should ask him how he really feels about you, mention those times you have hooked up and ask if he really only viewed it as casual sex. Then if he admits to having feelings for you, you can tell him that you have feelings also. Good Luck in whatever you choose, its tough ( I know-I've had to do this before) but usually it is worth it.

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You missy are at the big T junction of friendship.one way is Heaven and the other is Hell believe me ..its not funny if things dont work out . I mean even the Devil wants to run the other way.


2 things are obvious , he likes your company and respects your opinion . You dont give him any signals yet accept him to not flirt with other girls ..this is not his fault .


Guys like stuff to be straight up and not what if ..but all of that . TELL him you know he likes you so ..whats his next move ... be bold ..after all you NOw have more expectations from this realtionship then just friendship.


I think your friendship will go sour anyway , as he is sooner or later going to find some other person and you will be left wondering. You dont want to be in the other room if he is with his girlfirend do you!!!

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  • 2 weeks later...

Thanks for the responses everyone... I'm actually thinking of just giving up completely. It's hit me that if he did Actually have feelings for Me, he wouldn't have other girls in front of my face all the time... But that's just my opinion. I really have no idea how men think!... All I know for sure is that the more UNworthy of a person you are, the more worthy you get treated! I've always been there, been caring, done just about everything right shy of telling him how I feel; and it never made a difference! It wouldn't matter if I was the most perfect person on the planet, * * * * * y whores always win out! So I'm done with watching the skanky girls... and especially with my once-good friend male- * * * * * !

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  • 3 weeks later...

So you're using his natural instincts as a human being against him in order to cover up for the fact that you're unable to convey your feelings to him?


Like you said you'll never understand how the opposite gender's mind works so stop analyzing, interpreting and evaluating his actions with these other girls and bite the bullet if you still feel strongly enough about him.

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