Is it me or are girls extremely fussy now days, when it comes to dating guys?

[Bazzer]

Hey all.

 

Am I right in saying that girls are extremely fussy when it comes to dating guys? Especially with online dating...

 

I've been on lots of dates with different girls over the past few months, and I can say about 80 percent of the girls I went out with, I was happy to continue dating. But they were not feeling the same.

 

Are they more the players now days than the men?

[soul_soother]

Oh bazzer it's called the "Tyranny of Choice". Girls and guys around the world have discovered that the ocean is bigger then they thought, and their are plenty of fish around the sea. Before in the olden days you found someone dated for some months, engaged for a months or a year and married. Now a days we date for 5 years and sleep around, maybe engage 2 or 3 people lol. Times have just changed for guys and girls.

[CaptainPlanet]

Hey all.

 

Am I right in saying that girls are extremely fussy when it comes to dating guys? Especially with online dating...

 

I've been on lots of dates with different girls over the past few months, and I can say about 80 percent of the girls I went out with, I was happy to continue dating. But they were not feeling the same.

 

Are they more the players now days than the men?

 

Online dating is terrible. Women have hundreds of options.

 

The one attractive girl I know who did it had 90 emails in her email box after a day or two.

 

She replied to none of them and messaged only the guys she was interested in and now has a boyfriend.

 

Unless you look good on paper don't bother with online dating.

[mca1975]

I just dont get on-line dating. Its good for a laugh, but I think it is ESSENTIAL to meet someone in person before you can get a feel of what they are really like

[maka56]

I've tried online dating and have given up on it to find a partner lol, I'll still use it but not getting my hopes up with it, as said the women outnumber the men and can be very picky/choosey, stick to real life as we have done since mankind existed!.

[Batya33]

Why is it being a player to decide that you do not want a second date with someone? Would you prefer that the woman saw you again knowing it was going nowhere? I don't think that's being a player, it's being smart and not wasting one's time. When I met people through on line sites, I screened very well, and with those people I met in person I was interested in seeing about half of them again, about half of the people I was interested in asked me out again. (and there were people who were interested in me and I wasn't interested).

 

Also, see if you're screening properly - if you're having about one 20-30 minute phone conversation where you see if you would click enough to meet for an hour or so - and make sure you're not focusing too much on whether the woman looks like a hottie in her picture.

[ghost69]

it's preference. you aren't their type. boohoo i know. it's life. just like the girls you pick are your choice.

[StrawberryYogurt]

Well, that's online dating. Also, it can be seen as a good thing that girls are fussy so when you nab a girlfriend, you'll know she wants you b/c you are so awesome as opposed to her wanting to be with you just b/c she wants a boyfriend.

[MrRight]

I think it is beyound that. A number of people out there, including many women who rely on "online dating", are out of touch with basic instintcs and social connection. Personally I think the online dating approach is a sign of sick times we are living now. My sample regarding how effective is the online dating is small, only limited to 4 friends who have reported results of relationships engagement after three years via online dating. 3 out of 4 relationships went down the hill already. In my opinion that happens because people can portray their picture and initial behavior based on whatever you want them to be. Think about it, in the past people evaluated the overall qualities of an individual based on several factors. Not anymore. To make things worse, wIth online dating, people become so shy and averse to real, face-to-face contact that led many women simply to ignore men around them. Why should them bother, if you they can screen the stud online?

 

I think it is true that women are taking advantage on the online dating sites and they are doing "well" on that environment. That is not improving the number of divorce rate, declining in birth rates and overall degradation of families. thereforee I do not think that the online dating approach is necessarily working just because women can pick and choose more. I think it is a matter of watching what is going to happen to society in 10 years from now to see how it goes. I predict that the online dating approach is going to be so rewarding as it is children playing video games, being raised by outsourced nannies and eating junk food.

 

Personally I am looking for women who belong to other groups who are not into this game of "dating", online dating, dog exarcebation, etc. So far it has been working well, but that is rare to find though.

 

 

Hey all.

 

Am I right in saying that girls are extremely fussy when it comes to dating guys? Especially with online dating...

 

I've been on lots of dates with different girls over the past few months, and I can say about 80 percent of the girls I went out with, I was happy to continue dating. But they were not feeling the same.

 

Are they more the players now days than the men?

[D_Lish]

Hey all.

 

Am I right in saying that girls are extremely fussy when it comes to dating guys? Especially with online dating...

 

I've been on lots of dates with different girls over the past few months, and I can say about 80 percent of the girls I went out with, I was happy to continue dating. But they were not feeling the same.

 

Are they more the players now days than the men?

 

Nah, means they aren't into you.....

[allypally]

Online dating is rubbish because people want a relationship in an instant.

 

This is why they keep on going back to online dating because they think it will be the answer and a quicker remedy than dating conventionally. I have used online dating sites and I have always found the people to be a disappointment, since 'it never is what it says it is on the tin'!

[ManAbout]

If you are a guy, online dating is a bad deal. Because there are 2 men to every woman online, the women get a lot of attention. Even the unattractive ones are bombarded with emails. Take it offline. Women on dating sites usually have an inflated sense of worth because of the amount of attention they receive. An ordinary woman who might not get a second look walking down the street will act like a 9 online.

 

Try to meet women in your every day life. Your full personality does not come accross online. Women online make their selection on how good your picture looks and that is about it. Get off the computer and meet real women.

[beerman]

 

Try to meet women in your every day life. Your full personality does not come accross online. Women online make their selection on how good your picture looks and that is about it. Get off the computer and meet real women.

 

Boy, I couldn't agree more about your full personality not coming accross online. I have been trying the online thing lately and, quite frankly, the women who have ignored me are missing out!

[MrRight]

You hit the nail. I believe I am an example. At certain point I tried the online dating thing it was a waste of time for me. Women, who did not look any Paris Hilton, declined most of my invitations.

 

Then I go out and I often find women on the spot;everywhere I go, live. That tells me that the online dating thing may not make sense after all.

 

 

 

If you are a guy, online dating is a bad deal. Because there are 2 men to every woman online, the women get a lot of attention. Even the unattractive ones are bombarded with emails. Take it offline. Women on dating sites usually have an inflated sense of worth because of the amount of attention they receive. An ordinary woman who might not get a second look walking down the street will act like a 9 online.

 

Try to meet women in your every day life. Your full personality does not come accross online. Women online make their selection on how good your picture looks and that is about it. Get off the computer and meet real women.

[Batya33]

I never did on line dating (meaning I never typed and talked to someone I met on line and called it dating) but I met many men in person I originally contacted through on line dating sites. In general I had positive experiences (my whole purpose of having a profile up was to find a serious long term relationship, and that was stated very clearly in my profile so it weeded out many people looking for something casual). Just like in real life, some people wanted insta-relationship, some were treated it like a candy store, some were jerky, immature, the whole range of what you would find in real life, with the difference being that, as a supplement to meeting people the low tech way, it meant I could meet many more people in person than I otherwise would have had the opportunity to.

 

I did not find a serious long term relationship (but I did make a few long term friends), and I avoided any flings or casual dating, but at least 10 of my friends - all educated professionals, people with the best values, met their spouses/fiancees that way (similar types) so I know for sure that it can work great. All are happy together, some have children by this point in time.

 

I don't think one can generalize as long as it's used as a tool, a way to meet people in person - just like any other way - being set up on a blind date, going to a party, doing an activity, walking down the street. If it's used as a way to find a fling, it works great for that too I would assume.

 

It certainly takes a thick skin and for me it would never have been worth all that time and effort if I wasn't looking for something serious - and I would never suggest it to someone who was just looking for friends or to meet random people just to date.

 

In a weirdly indirect way it is a main reason my first "outing" with my boyfriend worked so well - I had had several bad dates in a row with people I met through on line sites, I was in one of those "throw in the towel modes" so when an old friend who I had dated years ago suggested a friendly "catch up" dinner (totally platonic) I was so relieved not to be on a date, not to have to talk about dating, not to have to dress up that I bet I was particularly laid back that night. That probably helped the sparks fly which caught us totally by surprise.

[D_Lish]

Women online make their selection on how good your picture looks and that is about it.

 

So do the men.

 

People will also go for people, that are way outta their leagues and simply hope for the best. I had guys as old as 61 year old mail me and boys as young as 18!!! Know that isn't nice to say, but looks are what initially attract BOTH sexes.....not just women.... and if you aint someones cuppa tea....then they aren't gonna reply!

[Batya33]

So do the men.

 

People will also go for people, that are way outta their leagues and simply hope for the best. I had guys as old as 61 year old mail me and boys as young as 18!!! Know that isn't nice to say, but looks are what initially attract BOTH sexes.....not just women.... and if you aint someones cuppa tea....then they aren't gonna reply!

 

It doesn't mean they're going for you as far as dating - it might be just to flirt on line, as part of a "dare" from friends, shopping for sex, or, yes, interest in dating. An acquaintance of mine got married at your age to a man in his 60s - neither believed the other to be out of his or her league. For example.

[D_Lish]

It doesn't mean they're going for you as far as dating - it might be just to flirt on line, as part of a "dare" from friends, shopping for sex, or, yes, interest in dating. An acquaintance of mine got married at your age to a man in his 60s - neither believed the other to be out of his or her league. For example.

 

Well, I don't go on them now and since I met someone in real life...

 

But when I did, I more was interested in my own age group, 30 - 40 age range.

 

And regardless of what they were looking for from me, the ones who attracted, only ever got the reply. Most, became good online friends, rather than potential dating material. There was an initial attraction perhaps, but no spark, no desire to follow up with a real life meeting. Some attracted, but appeared to have the personality of a goldfish.

 

I never dated anyone in real life, from the site I went on.

[thejigsup]

Ahem! I met my bf through online dating. We were both busy professionals and didn't drink or party so we had little chance of meeting anyone in our free time, (there wasn't and isn't really any). We are normal, well-adjusted, people and have been together for nine years. If it hadn't been for online dating we would never have met. To answer your questions, yes! Women today are more picky because many of us are professionals and make decent money. We want our men to be as successful as we are and also to have a passion for their careers. Handsome doesn't hurt, but isn't necessary. Intelligence is a must and so is a great sense of humor. You see, online dating gives everyone a bigger playing field, not just the women. Guys are pretty picky nowadays, also. It works both ways. Why settle for bologna when you can have a filet?

[Batya33]

Well, I don't go on them now and since I met someone in real life...

 

But when I did, I more was interested in my own age group, 30 - 40 age range.

 

And regardless of what they were looking for from me, the ones who attracted, only ever got the reply. Most, became good online friends, rather than potential dating material. There was an initial attraction perhaps, but no spark, no desire to follow up with a real life meeting. Some attracted, but appeared to have the personality of a goldfish.

 

I never dated anyone in real life, from the site I went on.

 

Sorry it didn't work for you. I focused on the exactly same age range when I had my profile up. I only replied to people whose profile was compatible with mine and only met after we spoke by phone. I didn't think of our typing and talking in terms of initial attraction, since we'd never met in person, but I met only if I thought we clicked enough to meet in person for 45 minutes for coffee.

[D_Lish]

Sorry it didn't work for you. I focused on the exactly same age range when I had my profile up. I only replied to people whose profile was compatible with mine and only met after we spoke by phone. I didn't think of our typing and talking in terms of initial attraction, since we'd never met in person, but I met only if I thought we clicked enough to meet in person for 45 minutes for coffee.

 

Yeah know what you mean....so you wern't going for looks really, you were looking for 'compatibility', 'shared interests', etc..

 

I would have to be attracted to the pic firstly, else there would be no interest in getting to know anyone further. Then, I'd check their profile details and if the profile was ok, I'd then hope that the personality matched the pic....but quite often it didn't and I didn't hang around. It takes more than an attractive pic, to hold and keep attention.

 

But I think that what you say makes sense, in that it's best to go off and meet immediatley to see if there is a *real life* attraction...

 

If I were to rejoin a site like this again in future, that's what I 'd do...meet asap.

[Batya33]

Well, that's not accurate. Looks matter to me, always have, always will. I don't have a particular type. I just know that I can't tell very well from a photo whether I like someone's looks for purposes of chemistry/attraction. There were instances where based on looks in the photo it was a definite no but that usually had to do more with their expression or an unintelligent look or with poor grooming than with particular features. If the photo showed someone very obese or very emaciated, it would be a decision based on looks plus my perceptions of their lifestyle/health.

[MD Geist]

Dating these days is more difficult than flying to mars.

 

I don't get it women would rather date some absive guy than be with someone who's a little shy yet respectable.

[Batya33]

Dating these days is more difficult than flying to mars.

 

I don't get it women would rather date some absive guy than be with someone who's a little shy yet respectable.

 

Who are these "women" you're referring to? (Certainly not me, or anyone I know).

[ManAbout]

So do the men.

 

People will also go for people, that are way outta their leagues and simply hope for the best. I had guys as old as 61 year old mail me and boys as young as 18!!! Know that isn't nice to say, but looks are what initially attract BOTH sexes.....not just women.... and if you aint someones cuppa tea....then they aren't gonna reply!

 

Yes, men send a message based solely on a picture. But, that is what we do in real life as well. Men only approach women that they find attractive. No difference there. Where as in real life, if a woman isnt instantly attracted to a mans looks, he can by means of his personality, style, humour etc. attract her to him. On an online site, the picture is all he has got.

 

The thing about online dating sites is that women get TONS of messages as long as they have a half decent picture up, or are showing some cleavage or whatever. Why? Because it is so easy. All you gotta do is copy and paste the same message to hundreds of girls. And getting rejected is a lot easier on your ego. So, guys bombard the girls on dating sites.

 

What does this do the girls on the site? Makes them SUPER picky. Maybe this girl gets asked out once a week in real life, but on a dating site, she is more popular than a supermodel.

 

That is why I say, for guys, dont waste your time on dating sites. Sure, it is easy to send out a hundred messages. But, when you are a decent looking guy and you start getting rejected by fatties online that you wouldnt look at in real life, it is gonna effect your game. Get offline and go out and meet some real women.