Couples with different political beliefs?

[ava321]

I am wondering if anyone out there has been in a successful, happy relationship with someone who holds very different political beliefs (from international policies/abortion/gay rights/government services/you name it...) then you

 

I began dating someone about 4 1/2 months ago, who I like very much.. We have a great time, and he is very loving and caring. But we see things so differently, and some of his beliefs I find really unsettling and to be frank, upsetting. He is less involved with these issues then me, and is not so bothered by my views. I admire his tolerance and acceptance of my viewpoint but am having a really hard time reciprocating these sentiments, but in my heart realize what a wonderful guy he is and want to get over my intolerance... but sometimes I really wonder: if our outlooks on these issues are so vastly different, how compatible are we really?

 

Any advice would be really appreciated...Thanks

[gracerules2008]

I don't know. Politics effects every area of our lives. I take it very seriously. I'm so serious that I appoint myself to become a voting patrol officer around election time. Yep I will be doing that this november.

 

Would it be a deal-breaker if my girlfriend had different political views? probably not.

[Samedy]

I think it depends on how close these issues are to both people and how they react to the different view points.

 

I'm a fairly conservative person. However I am not very politically active. I don't go to rally's or protests, I probably wouldn't even sign a petition.

 

If I were dating someone more liberal, and they had the same relaxed attitude towards politics it wouldn't be a problem.. However, if they started pushing me to be politically involved in their causes, I might become more objectionable.

[Timebandit]

I know couples who have fairly different political views, and it doesnt seem to cause them much problem.

 

I think the main question is how strung up your identities are on your political view. Some people have no problem accepting that other people have vastly different opinions. Other people seem to be preaching their opinions quite a lot, and see people with other opinions as stupid, flawed or even ungodly.

 

You need to gauge how much you opinions means to the both of you.

[kuhl282000]

Thats why i never talk about that stuff .....

 

Everyone is entitled to their opinon

[hers]

I think it makes it harder, like having different religious backgrounds, especially if one person takes something very seriously.

 

With my last boyfriend, I made a remark about how much I respect cops and how being a police officer woudl be my dream job, and he went off abot that's crazy and all cops are corrupt and don't deserve respect and all of that. Yeah it caused a big fight.

 

I myself won't date anyone who at least doesn't agree with my views on abortion and gay marriage. I am not a political person at all, but those 2 issues I take very seriously and am passionate about my views of them, and someone whose opinion is different reveals to me that they have a tendency to be closed-minded or uptight (I take the very liberal side to those issues). It reveals a deeper truth to their character, I believe.

 

Just my opnion, no one bash me for it!

[smickly]

I have very different political views then my boyfriend. The situation is exacerbated by the fact that he's a fairly conservative american citizen and I'm a relatively liberal canadian...

 

There are a few things that make it work. One we are both fairly grounded and know the facts. Niether of us gets too worked up, and this can lead to some excellent political discussions. Yes I love playing devils advocate and trying to work him, he's really good at ignoring that though!

 

I think the most important thing to consider, is whether or not his/her political beliefs are apparent in how they treat you. Preaching, converting, disrespect, dismissal of your feelings/opinions would probably be the deal breakers for me - not just the differing opinions.

[riley123]

Have you ever heard of the marriage between ragin' cajun liberal James Carville and 'salty' conservative Mary Matalin?

 

If they can make it work, then any couple with differing political beliefs can.

[hers]

Have you ever heard of the marriage between ragin' cajun liberal James Carville and 'salty' conservative Mary Matalin?

 

If they can make it work, then any couple with differing political beliefs can.

 

wow i had no idea he was married to a conservative! interesting.

[shikashika]

Depends,

 

 

Politics are values, which I think are important in a relationship.

 

could I date a guy who was homophobic, anti-abortion and makes comments like "these immigrants keep stealing our jobs'... or 'send them back to where they came from'... or..."I work hard, thereforee I deserve it"

 

No way.

 

I broke up with a guy in my early twenties because we just thought to differently about things. Wouldn't ever work for me.

[taxi10]

I know a couple who have different views in everthing and they fight every week ends - too bad, I should be there all the time to sort out their differences. It is a big deal for some and others not.