BlueEyedBoy Posted August 13, 2008 Share Posted August 13, 2008 The relationship with my girlfriend of over 4.5 years had a rocky beginning at best, take a look at my posts from late 2004 if you wish. Unfortunately she was unfaithful to me, however 4 years on we're still happily together - or so i thought. As You read this please don't think that i'm dwelling on the past, I can honestly say that it's not something i think about anymore and that ive been able to trust her completely. The only reason I mention it is that recent events made me realize that perhaps there is still a trust issue and i guess thats what this post is all about. As far as i was aware things between her and i have been fine for a long time, i feel warm and at ease when i'm around her, I enjoy her company. I love her and She's my best friend too. But, and it is a big but, it would be fair to say that we appear to have fallen into a routine, every day very much the same and not much in the way of passion or romance. I feel that I'm very much to blame for this, i slipped into "the comfort zone" and i fear that she may feel as though she become more of a friend than a lover. Moving on to the point, Recently, a little over a week, this routine has been blown apart. many things have changed, some big, some small. Shes not at home at the times she normally is, sometimes i call her several times before she answers. Probably things that i shouldn't need to be concerned about but its so out of character for her. There is one thing that i'm currently worried sick to the stomach about. Last Sunday afternoon, a time when she would normally be home, she was'nt. I called her, she told me she was walking to go and see a friend, i offered to take her in the car, she declined which is odd because she never turns down a lift. Furthermore, she didn't sound like she was walking anywhere. I may be wrong but i thought it would be fairly easy to tell if someone was inside say a vehicle or a dwelling, or outside walking even in mild weather, it did not sound like this was the case. I quizzed her as to where she was and she simply replied "no". not even an answer that makes sense to the question "where are you?" She eventually relluctantly accepted my offer of a lift but rather than telling me where she was, she came to meet me. she approached 5 mins later from a direction no where near a route between home and her friends. I quizzed her about this also, ahe said that she was going via her uncles. Fair enough but why not mention it on the phone? Just this evening, Ive opened the lid on the whole thing. I asked her if she felt everything was ok between us and initially she said yes but with an uncertain tone in her voice. Concerned i talked to her a some more and eventually she revealed that she feels that our relationship has gone stale. I asked her if she thought it was beyond repair and she said she wasn't sure. I would honestly do anything i could to first of all begin to understand what state this relationship is in and hopefully put back together the broken pieces. I love her to the end of the earth and I dont want to loose her, but i'm scared, Scared because i obviously do still have trust issues which may end up driving her away and scared that i may do everything i can but end up getting hurt again. Link to comment
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