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I can't stop my depression because i keep thinking if by her last text i should have responded or after i found out the truth and she still said otherwise did i push her away that much? i keep wanting to contact her but i know i would be hurt either way i mean she is already in a relationship but i still love her more than anything. we were broke up for 2 weeks i got a feeling she was seeing an old friend of mine and then a buddy told me yes i freaked out called her she still said no you dont even know what your talking about. as soon as she hung up on me i did NC ive been doing NC since then i feel like when she called back i should have picked up instead i let her leave a mean voicemail and have never talked to her since the love of my life is gone we drifted away because of jealousy whenever we fought it was only jealousy i miss everything about this girl I cant seem to find anything to keep my mind off her. I keep blaming myself and i definetely shouldnt. I have seen her around and we just look at each other or make sure we dont look at each other by avoiding eye contact we certianly dont speak to each other. Its weird i feel like if she was over me she'd talk to me maybe im wrong i dont even know why i care i guess i deserve better but she was in honesty my dream girl i was so attracted to her emotionally and physically i have never experienced love like that before in my life. the chemistry was so strong. How can i stop blaming myself for someone elses actions and NC? should i keep doing it or not.

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I think mnayof us have those hope is the beginning. Afrer a week or two or three ... the light finally dawns that they are not coming back.

 

That is when NC gets tough again.

 

Hold onto NC for YOUR healing, not as an attempt to get her back. You may be surprized whatyou learn about yourself and the realtionship when you are able to distance yourself from it a bit.

 

Best of luck in your journey

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