I'm stuck in an exclusive half/non-relationship

[Anna.]

OK, so my daughter's father and i are stuck in some kind of weird limbo. He moved out 4 months ago after living together for about a year. He gets her 2 non-consecutive nights a week (one being a weekend night). This is because he wants to be a big part of her life and we feel like she's too little for the every other weekend thing. She's only 7 months.

 

The custody arrangement works out great. But I call him when she does anything awesome (She just got a tooth!) and his stuff is still at my house (furniture, knick-knacks, etc...). So we are talking all the time. Admittedly I do just call him and send him text messages whenever I feel like it. He just thinks I'm crazy. Whatever. We still love each other, but butt heads constantly. And he refuses to show anybody any vulnerability.

 

We started being intimate again and I still go to his family functions. So we (meaning I) decided we'd have to be exclusive which was cool with him. I don't think it's gonna work anytime soon, though, and I want more out of a relationship. I go out when i don't have the baby and I do have an active life, so I could meet somebody else.

 

BUT how the heck could either of us break away and date someone new? Our lives are so entangled. Btw, he has NO desire to "date" (maybe have sex with, though) anyone else. I get the feeling and am actually positive that if he wanted to be fully invested in a relationship, it'd be with me, but he just doesn't want to be fully invested in a relationship.

 

But we have so much chemistry (physically and emotionally) and he's my best friend when I don't completely hate him, which is often as well. We do the whole 'I pick at him until he explodes which makes me act psycho which makes him try to ignore me' thing ALL the time. It's cyclical, b/c after I feel I've sufficiently been psycho enough I start being nice again and one of us apologizes and we're bff again.

 

So what do I do? Stay exclusive in this weird half/non-relationship, or somehow try to break away from him and be single (which you'll have to explain to me how to do that if you think that's the right choice)?