Delusional Kisses Posted August 7, 2008 Share Posted August 7, 2008 Long story made short. I met him two years ago. We started off as sex buddies and became best friends. I've been madly in love with him for well over a year now. He is well aware of my feelings. Through all of this time, he says that he "can't be with me right now" or "give him some time. He's not ready for anything that serious" "He loves me but...", blah, blah, blah. I'm not a stupid girl, so I KNOW! Anyway, last summer he started dating someone and we stayed friends...and became even closer. When they broke up, we were inseperable. We did have sex on several occasions. I never pushed for anything more than that. He even mentioned marriage a few times, but I was so scared of being rejected again that I just wrote it all off. He moved back home in March which is 600 miles from me. I went to see him (per his request) just two weeks after he left and go to meet his family and friends. It went wonderfully. I came back home. We spoke daily, etc. In early June, I planned my second trip there. I was going to talk to him. Tell him I wanted us to be together. I would move, change jobs...whatever. The week before my trip, he called to tell me he had started seeing someone. I was devestated. I told him I wouldn't come. H begged and I told him what my plans had been. He listened and when I asked if that would have been a possibility, his exact response was "I don't know. I won't say never. But now? No. I'm sorry". He begged me to come anyway and I did. It was miserable. When I left, I told him bye...that was it...I wanted no more of what we had. I couldn't take it anymore. Seven days passed and he texted me randomly and casually and we have had several random and casual conversations since. A few weeks passed like this and on Sunday, I broke down and told him how much I missed him and how I wish we hadn't grown so far apart over the past months. He didn't answer my texts. Two days pass, and I get a text yesterday that says "I'm officially single again". What does that mean? Part of me thinks that this is just a pattern I will see over and over again, but part of me KNOWS deep down in my soul that he loves me. I know he does. I don't have a doubt. And as stupid as it sounds, I think he doesn't think he is good enough for me just like so many other people tell me. I wish I could make him see what I see in him. I love him so much and know that if we gave each other a good, honest chance, we could make a good run at it...it should be given a chance...we should be given a chance. Help! Link to comment
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