How manly should a man be?

[bertdru]

I always have this feeling that I am not manly enough. I am scared of a lot of things - spiders, snakes, dogs, cockroaches, lizards and so on. I can't make quick decisions(I heard women like that). I don't think I behave normally when I have to face my fears.

 

This is one of the reasons why I am scared of marriage and long term relationships. I just don't think I am manly enough to be a good husband and a good father.

[DN]

It is not a measure of a man that he has fears - it is how he deals with his fears that really matters.

[SchecterGuy]

Manliness is going out of style. Do not stress about it.

[bmwm3]

^ being a man will never go out of style....

[SchecterGuy]

Living in the bay area it seems to be the case.

[bmwm3]

^ that is true... but thats if you want to date guys instead of women....

 

I live in oregon and ct... and being a man.. will get you much further with women...

[SchecterGuy]

There is kind of a culture shock. When I go just outside of the bay area closer to the Sacramento area it seems to get a little more blue collar and a little more manly. Here it is very flashy and seems a little * * * * * Eye-ish.

[Scorpion Fury]

Manliness is going out of style. Do not stress about it.

 

It's all a matter of personal preference. Some girls like a sensitive man. I personally, like my men to be "manly" to some degree. I certainly would not want to date someone I had the ability to beat up.

[Loki71]

It is not a measure of a man that he has fears - it is how he deals with his fears that really matters.

 

I agree.. My father is very afraid of snakes does that make him less of a man? Heck no I have seen him knock guys out with one punch. Was he less of a father? NO in fact he was a better father because it made me see that it was ok to be afarid of things and that it was ok to admit it.

[Bkoguy07]

lol I'm from the south so its pretty manly here.

[jojesse]

Being manly does not mean not having fears. We all have fears - it's a part of being human.

 

I think different women have different perceptions of what manliness is, to a certain extent. Some women are impressed with chivalry, some women equate manliness with muscles, etc. etc.

 

For me, a guy is manly if he has confidence to speak his mind and the ability to stand up for himself/not be a pushover. There is also manliness in mannerisms, i.e., if a person uses too many hand gestures while talking, he will seem unmanly to me.

 

You mentioned the ability to make quick decisions as a characteristic of manliness. For me, it's not so much the ability to make a quick decision but the ability to think logically through problems and make rational, solid decisions, rather than rash, wishy-washy decisions.

 

Also, once in a relationship, manliness means the ability to make me feel safe, both emotionally and physically.

[ghost69]

being comfortable in your own skin and knowing who you are. that's all a man is.