Being in a state of "limbo"

[martin6565]

Hi Everyone,

 

I've posted my story on the forums and got some good advice about how to get back together with my ex of 3 years who I dumped 8 months ago. "Be persistent, SHOW her you care, work on yourself". Took me 4 months to realize I wanted her back and i've been trying so hard ever since....

 

I'm in a state of "limbo", like most of us here. It's emotionally exhausting to consistently be thinking of her, stressing over what she says, nervous when I think of her, and depressed to know all the effort i'm putting into SHOWING her the REAL me. It's an emotional roller coaster that i'm ready to stop.

 

So in your experience, how have you dealt with confronting the "limbo" after your relationship. What happened when you gave them the ultimatum that it's either give this another try, or i'm gone? (obviously you'd say it nicer than that! lol)

 

Hopefully we can get some encouragement and success stories

[lapseinjudgement]

I dont have a success story to offer yet.. well hopefully thats a 'yet' haha. I think that limbo place is a dangerous line to walk. I told my ex as sad as it made me and as much as it hurt i couldnt just be her 'friend'. It really tore me up to say that but like you said its a roller coaster and its a hard line to walk.

 

Hope for the best and try to take every step (at least concerning the ex) one at a time with a lot of thought before the motion.

 

I hope to add a success story someday. we'll see.

[GoldenHillGuy]

Did you read my story? I couldn't stay in limbo land very long. Just about 2 weeks. I really just couldn't handle it. I knew she was acting funny. Some days were good, and some were bad. I asked where I stood, got handed the friend card, and gave it right back. I don't want anything to do with that crap. Now maybe, just maybe, if I had waited longer, been there for her for a few more months I could've won her over. I really don't think so in my case. You have to look VERY CLOSELY at her actions. Do NOT read into anything she says. Does she open up to your touch? This was the big red flag with my ex. She wasn't comfortable with me touching her. Keep your eyes and ears open. And if it really becomes too much for you, you are the only one in control of yourself. Just ask her where you stand. Just be ready for either answer. And don't accept the friend card. You're better than that.

[Jetta]

I tried it and it didn't work out. Being all nice all the time isn't me, and I'm considered too nice. LOL When we did get close again I repelled. So as much as I think I want him back I really don't. I just miss the family I dreamed of having. And well I guess I wasn't meant for it in the traditional sense.