2900 Posted July 29, 2008 Share Posted July 29, 2008 our relationship started off as fwb. he and i were both big whores. and he has cheated on previous girlfriends. so the last month and a half the sex has been minimal. this is the biggest red flag. hes always been very very horny and we used to have sex literally all night and not sleep. lately we haven't really had any. his excuse: the dog barking, i was sick, he was sick, we were too drunk, we were too hung over in the morning. ok. so i dropped him off at his place the other day and he makes a comment "oh, the neighbors probably think im a who.re because i keep getting dropped off in different cars" i jump on it right away. and he says he meant for the time he has lived there. sunday night he calls me says he wants to spend the night and will call me in 45 minutes and if im up he will come over. well, i pass out as soon as i lay in bed. but i did not have a missed call from him in the morning. that morning we talk and he mentions he couldn't sleep that night. later in the evening i ask him, so why didn't u call me we to come over? and his answer is because the knocked out right away. but later in the day he said he couldn't sleep. i question him about why his story doesn't match. he says, well i did pass out but then i woke up and couldn't go back to sleep. am i just being paranoid??? Link to comment
riley123 Posted July 29, 2008 Share Posted July 29, 2008 our relationship started off as fwb. he and i were both big whores. and he has cheated on previous girlfriends. What were your expectations when you started a relationship with him? Did you really think he was long-term 'boyfriend material' based on his history Link to comment
2900 Posted July 29, 2008 Author Share Posted July 29, 2008 it was never my intention to get into a relationship with him. in fact, i did the fwb thing with him because initially i did not think i would ever develop feelings for him. he was not "my type". we carried on the fwb thing for about a year and he then he told me he loved me. and a few months after that we decided to try out the relationship thing. Link to comment
WindowTo Posted July 29, 2008 Share Posted July 29, 2008 A womans instincts on this matter are the most accurate gauge, besides actualy knowing... That he has cheated before means he can do it again. Dont be paranoid, just be straightforward as possible. Link to comment
ycmanvs Posted July 29, 2008 Share Posted July 29, 2008 That is why it is best to keep your FWB as just that and not expect anything more. Did you really think that he would change for you, or that you would ever be able to trust him, knowing what you know about his past? Even if he is doing absolutely nothing wrong, you are always going to be suspicious....so unless you can deal with someone who you can never trust, you should get out now....or go back to FWB status and look for someone else. Link to comment
2900 Posted July 29, 2008 Author Share Posted July 29, 2008 you make complete sense and ive considered it so many times. we both have trouble trusting each other and i cheated in previous relationships as well. but so far i have been good. life would be easier without this paranoia but i can't seem to get myself to walk away. sigh... Link to comment
TechResQ Posted July 29, 2008 Share Posted July 29, 2008 In other words, I would say you are probably not paranoid, given his past history. Sorry to be negative, but it sounds as though you should trust your instincts. You're gut feeling is usually correct. I would talk to him and ask him to come clean and be honest with you. See what he does and how he acts. Good luck! God Bless Link to comment
ycmanvs Posted July 29, 2008 Share Posted July 29, 2008 I doubt that he will tell you the truth, so I really do not think asking him will help much. You could just let him know that you cannot trust him and that you would like to be able to see other people too and explore your options. Link to comment
pinkelephant Posted July 29, 2008 Share Posted July 29, 2008 well, people do change so i think that you should give him a chance to explain himself and look for other clues in the mean time. Link to comment
ycmanvs Posted July 29, 2008 Share Posted July 29, 2008 well, people do change so i think that you should give him a chance to explain himself and look for other clues in the mean time. He may have changed, but she will always be suspicious, because she will always wonder if he has truly changed. Link to comment
2900 Posted July 29, 2008 Author Share Posted July 29, 2008 relationships suck. and i hate always wondering if he's cheating. it drives me crazy and it hurts. i wish i could just trust him. but i just can't. Link to comment
fixyou_ Posted August 3, 2008 Share Posted August 3, 2008 Always trust your intuition. Link to comment
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