New to this!

[Hana90]

Don't no where to start really. I'll start by saying i'm new to the whole distance reltionship thing. Tbh it's not really a distant relationship he does work 2 hours away and stays there through out the week. He comes back when he can at weekends. Me and my boyfriend have been together about 2 months not long but i really fell for him. It's hard because in my last relationship we was together all the time so missing my boyfriend is really horrid. I find it difficult to keep a postive head about this, because not only is the distance a problem but i have been jobless for a few months and really having no hope finding a job. So i can't always afford to go see him. I keep thinking is this actually going to work, because deep down i'm having doubts.

I don't know if to end it before feeling get to deep or keep going with it.

Need some advice cause i've never done this before.

[surfjon]

Hmmm,

I'm confused too....

The girl I was crazy about has a job that has taken her back to Wisconsin, but I'm in South Florida. She originally intended to stay, thought she had a job, but it fell thru at the last minute and she had no choice, she had to leave.....

 

We were "exclusive" for 5 months, lots of bumpy times but I really thought she had some great qualities and we liked the same lifestyle, she made me feel alive......

 

I was married 20 years until a year ago. I'm new to modern dating and liked this girl, but I don't know if I can do the LDR thing, I need someone I can see regularly, I feel like I need someone close enough to have those spontaneous "let's go to ....." and not have to fly 1500 miles!!

 

To me, it just seems LDR's are a waste of time, postponing the inevitable break up and who knows, maybe Mr/Mrs Right came along but we were on the stinking phone long distance and didn't answer the door !!!!

 

H E L P ! ! ! !

[Lisk]

To me, it just seems LDR's are a waste of time, postponing the inevitable break up and who knows, maybe Mr/Mrs Right came along but we were on the stinking phone long distance and didn't answer the door !!!!

 

I'd just like to say that I think this is a very lame argument* because there is nothing to say that a regular relationship is always going to work out either. Maybe while you're with a person in a Non-LDR, on the sofa watching a movie, you don't answer the door to Mr/Mrs Right. Its all the same, IMO.

 

*just clarifying that I don't like the argument, nothing against you personally.

 

Hana: LDR's are not for everyone, obviously. Its very hard, and often times even painful. I know it is in my case. But my girl and I are truly in love, so we push through with eachother's support.

If you don't think you can handle it, you need to relay that to your boyfriend, and at least see what he thinks about it. Maybe he'll have some inspiration to keep you going...maybe not. One of the biggest things in LDR's is communication, so communicate!

[Barry Allen]

The way I see it, if your gut is feeding you more doubts than hopes, you should break it off. And the fact that you're too ready to give up on finding a job means that you have a problem with dedication and commitment. There is always someone somewhere looking for a good employee for their company, and you could be that person, but without taking the time to go out there and find it, you're really only harming yourself. Likewise, if you're not willing to get to work and find your place in the life of someone who is only two hours away, then you honestly shouldn't bother starting up a LDR.

 

I would advise you to break up with him. LDRs aren't for everyone, and require strong people who are willing to work no matter what the cost. Nothing personal, but you just don't seem to have that in you. Thankfully it's only been two months, so it should be easier on the both of you if you were to break up with him now, rather than later on down the road when the doubts in your gut start getting stronger and the paranoia starts setting in.