Self Consciousness/Low Self Esteem with my looks

[acheheart]

Well, although I've been told by many girls that I look good, I doubt them. I just assume they're being nice because they were friends of mine and I ask them to judge how I look. I've never had anyone notice me otherwise though, I've always had to initiate and work my way up instead of having them take interest in me first. Maybe there are people that find me attractive, who knows. The main problem is however, when ever someone makes a rude joke about my looks, or just calls me ugly, I'd feel horrible. It's like, I doubt the good but accept the bad I guess... Any suggestions?

 

 

 

 

I'm not really sure where I should have posted this, so excuse me if this is the wrong place.

[Clementine orange]

Cough, cough, don't ask someone if you are good looking - if they are a friend then of course they are going to say yes. Also strangers don't walk around telling other people they are good looking.

Beside, how do you know FOR SURE you are not good looking? How can we possibly be objective about these things?

 

You could also try "acting" good looking. Look at some of those celebrities - they aren't THAT great looking, they just behave like they are and we all buy into it.

[DLtoken]

^^^ hahah. Very true about the celebs.

 

Just don't sweat it man. You are what you are and, to tell you the truth, there really aren't that many ugly people out there.

[LAYAAN]

Hello acheheart,

I understand what you are saying. I was raised by a set of parents that constantly kept telling me "you are not pretty." I was constantly compared with my sisters as they were prettier than me. As a result, even though I'm okay looking I grew up being very hard on myself in terms of looks, brains etc. Learn to love yourself first. Each one of us has some strengths and weaknesses. There are certain problem areas in us that we can work on eg. acne, yellow teeth, weight issues, walking with a confident upright posture, a good career/job, dressing style. These things can be fixed. There are certain areas that can't be fixed eg. your height, your bone structure. So learn to work around these areas. Consider going to those people that help you with makeover and grooming etc. Have you watched "how to look good naked?" Sometimes we are too hard on ourselves. Sometimes its just us that think that we are not at par. Others may not look at us like that. They may actually find us attractive. Learn to accept yourself first. Understand the areas that are fixable Vs non-fixables. Improve fixable areas and work around non-fixables. Work on developing confidence and personality. Nothing beats that.

Good luck! Don't be too hard on yourself. We all have problem areas and thats okay.

[sidehop]

There isn't going to be a person that EVERYONE will think he/she is hot. I've had comments one extreme to another so it did do some damage long ago and still sticks with me but hey, you can't please everyone out there

 

I love orange's comment, it's so true about celebs!!!