anger!

[beaglegirl]

A little backgroud.. I've been with my boyfriend for 3+ years and of that time, we have lived together for over 2 years. Generally speaking, things are great but this anger issue has been insurmountable lately.

He is not the type of person to discuss his problems or anything.. he keeps everything bottled up and explodes later. Combine that with someone who has a very,very short fuse. He blows up about just about everything lately. He takes it out on me, the dog, or whatever is around. He often does not remember what he says or what he does after his angry episodes, but I certainly do. He's mean, sometimes violent with things.. he's never hit me, but he did raise his hand like he was going to once. It scares me. It's like he isn't in his right mind. I try to get him to just take a time out, which usually helps but he is never done with one of these little episodes without something broken/ripped/ damaged etc. To make it even worse, he is very picky about me not 'telling him what to do' so trying to force him to do anything just brings on another episode. I have talked to him about this in a calmer moment and seemed to get a bit through to him, but I can't press the issue a lot. I don't want to leave him, but I also can't let this continue. I just don't know what to do- nothing seems to work!

[Love_Music]

Has he tried anger management? Or talked to a counselor or anything like that?

[kuhl282000]

Anger is really a hurt or a fear that turns into resentment after awhile. People who get angry normally do not like people who will challenge them or confront them. If someone does not get through to him and soon (and that may have to be you, I'm sorry to say) what normally happens it in a fit of rage then end up leaving in the end and they just jump ship and move on to another. They end up transferring the anger into the new relationship and they never end up getting close to anyone. And the really sad part is they never get to share and intimacy with anyone.

 

Good Luck .......be careful if their is violence. That hand that was raised at you is a sure sign of things to come and its just a matter of time.

 

Kuhlanie

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Actually, you should get out...and you should start reading up on abusive relationships...because that is the road you are going down. Abuse starts with breaking stuff...then it escalates into beating up their partner, the children, the dog. He needs help...the longer you and the dog stay in this, eventually you and the dog will be his punching bag. You are already being intimidated into submission...you are walking on eggshells and are not allowed to address his bad behaviours with him or else there are reprisals. Please do yourself and your dog a favour and get the hell out now before you get sucked in even more.