Jump to content

How to become more social, I'm sort of clueless


Recommended Posts

At some point in middle school, I became very self-concsious about my height (I'm 5'5" now) and it prevented me from having any kind of social life. I went through high school without going to 1 party or ever hanging out much with people outside of school. There were many times when I hung out with people from my part time job, and they were good friends but that only lasted until we all separated after graduation.

So fastforward to college (I'm 24 now and about a year left of school) and I've definitely become more social, made good friends with roomates I had the past couple years, but most of them have graduated. Now I only have one friend that I'm roomates with and hang out with. He knows a lot more people, has a larger social circle.

I realized that I want a larger social circle, but I find it difficult because it is like everyone already has their own social circles and I'd have to "infiltrate" one of them. It is like I missed my oppurtunity freshmen year to make friends for the next several years.

I think the problem is that I don't know how to act around new people, and people might mistake that for a lack of self-confidence, or make me look stand-offish. I've noticed that even though I don't initiate conversation much, it is rare that people talk to me or try and get to know me. I'm concerned about this primarily because I think it is a part of what prevents me from meeting girls. It would be much easier to meet them if I was more social, had more friends and went out more. Has anyone else been in this situation? How did you become less socially awkward and start making a better first impression with people?

Link to comment

You could ask your room mate politely if you could hang out with him / her and his / her friends. I know you feel awkward about as you said but your gonna have to go for it if you want a social circle. Unless you work and ask some work friends about going out. If there is an upcoming work party or gathering it would be a good idea.


Once your in a social event, not talking to anyone is sort of normal as you don't know any of them. Just stick to your room mate or work mate and wait for the people he or she is talking to, to start talking first. Usually what I do when trying to meet new people.


You will feel really awkward at first I can tell you that, but once you get your foot in as they call it, you will be able to recap the party or gathering with them after and make the conversation go forward after that the next time you meet them.


Good luck.

Link to comment


This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Create New...