I am so depressed...

[NameIsMud]

My mom yells at me every single day! And it seems like she is never satisfied with what I do. I get straight As at school and have honor, AP classes, but she always look at me and say "All you can do is eating, wasting my money. Can you do anything? I am single mother supporting the whole family, you loser! Look at you! Loser! My friends' kids are all earning money now!"

Every time I hear this, I feel so, so upset. First, not all of her friends' kids are making money. Second, those who are making money just skip school and are much older than I am. She never paid a cent on my tuition. I though the books I borrowed and online, not like any of the kids at my high school spending thousands on extra tuition. To be honest, I am jealous of every single kid at my school. They have the chances of getting more educations outside of school, while I, nothing!!! And I am sometimes fed up when I see some kids just don't like to study but have the chance to do it!

And now, because my mom did a bad investment, she starts to scream, very very loudly, every single day! And she complains about me being a child and not being able to drive, (I'm 15, after all, what can I do? Break the laws?) She says I am such a loser because I can't drive while her friends' kids can. This really pisssssssssssssed me off!!!!!! I just can't stand it! And when I ask her could I have couple hundreds to join a tuition, she slaps me without saying a word!!!!! Really, I want to slap her!!! I know by all means it's wrong, but it's just too...ridiculous!! I didn't, of course, but I kind insulted her by saying "Do you have a mouth?" Then, she just threw two pans toward my way, and they hit me. I didn't try to avoid them, cuz I was thinking if this could kill me, then I'll let it do the killing. After, a woman doesn't have much strength, so the pans didn't hurt me. But I was truly heart-broken... I wondered, what does she want me to be? A straight As student with all honor and AP courses and making the monthly payment of the house? I am done with it!! Why do I deserve being called a loser with all the thing I've done? I even make money for her from Google Ads. Why my mom is never-satisfied? I've done all I could. I heard a lot of parents praise and award their kids for getting As at school, why the only thing my parent could say is " You are a loser? " I was originally going to study guitar, but my mom simply said, with disdain, "Don't waste my money on a guitar, you will never learn!"

I don't know if she has eyes or not, I've learned so much things by myself, and all these things cannot be the evident for I am an autodidact?

I don't know what to do. I know for sure she will not spend any money on my college. And I know I won't be able to take two majors which I've been always craving to do. And now, I don't even know if she will ever support me through my high school life...

[LittleInuit]

First off, I would like to say good job on making straight A's, 'specially with the honors and AP classes. I attend a magnet school. I know how hard it is to make straight A's. Next, I know what it is like to feel like you're not good enough. My dad is legally blind and my brother has a mental illness. My mom is the only one able to work, so I never see her. I am the person that takes care of my dad and brother. It's tough, and my dad always tells me that I don't do enough and that I spend too much time with my boyfriend. I know how frustrated you feel when you have done everything you can, and it still not be enough. I don't know what your mom is going through, but the main reason my dad does that to me is becuase he is taking out his anger and frustration of his blindness out on me. Perhaps your mom is doing the same thing. She is wrong for putting you down. You are doing the best you can, and she needs to except that. Have you tried talking to her about how she treats you? Sometimes it can help, and sometimes it makes it worse. I'm not really good at advice giving, but I just wanted to let you know that I'm here if you want someone to listen.

 

And about college, you make good grades. There are scholarships that should take care of you. Good luck with school.

[Crush85]

My advice is to keep getting A's, focus on what YOU need to do. Get a part-time job at some point, save up your money, and get the hell out of there when you're 18.

[emailas]

you are NOT a loser-your mother has issues and she is projecting her sense of failure onto you.

 

The biggest favour you can do for yourself is to keep doing well at school- keep your eyes on the the big picture. A good education creates lots of opportunities. You've done it till now without her help so keep it up- well done!!

 

Talk to a career counsellor at school, speak to your teachers about your financial situation, ask them for ideas, apply for as many scholarships as you can, get your teachers to support you as referees.

You sound bright, hardworking and ambitious- you will get there, even if it's the long way round. Don't let someone talk you out of the greatness you are capable of!!