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What to do next in online dating?


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Hi all,


A question for those who have been on online dating sites, feedback from the ladies would be helpful.


When do you take the plunge and ask to meet?


I have been chatting to this woman since yesterday. She winked at me so, I sent her a mail.


she replied tonight and we have exchanged about 4 mails. Mostly talked about travelling and light stuff. She literally lives 10 minutes from me.


I am kinda thinking we should but, didnt think i should ask until i got some advice...


Over to you lovely people.....


TC x

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I would strongly suggest talking on the phone 1 or 2 times first! But make sure she is OK with that, drop a hint like "This on-line chatting is so impersonal, I prefer talking on the phone or in person..." or try suggestiong it "Hey, we should talk on the phone next time" and feel out her repsonse...


Chatting for 2 days is NOT an indication that she wants to meet. Slow down dude!

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I suck on the phone intially so I find it to not be pleasant and not a good way to allow someone to get to know me. I'm better in person so I'd rather meet someone in person first and then talk on the phone. Plus, if the guy is a total freak and stalker, I would hate for him to have my phone number. Some women are different that me and may prefer a phone conversation before meeting but I have no problem going straight for the first meet up. A cup of coffee with some guy is not going to kill me even if the guy is not what I am looking for.


And if I am emailing for more than a week or so with a guy and he does not suggest meeting up, I lose a lot of respect for his dating technique - man up and ask me out if you are interested.

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Fair enough. I have done the on-line dating thing enough to be able to tell if a woman is interested, or just chatting. It's obvious from the "conversations". I find when they ask alot of questions, or do a bit of flirting, or at least act interested, I will suggest a phone call or meet up. But many times I sense someone is just being polite or passing time by chatting on line.


But it all comes down to fear of rejection. What's the worst that can happen if you ask someone on-line to meet up...they can say no...that's the absolute worst that can happen, not really all that bad!

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Hey guys,


thanks for all your replies.........


Well I have asked her for coffee well 'It would be good to meet you for coffee at some point'


I took the gamble as well whats the worst that can happen, thats why I paid the money to meet a woman so, i figure its a game of trying and eventually it may pay off.


I will keep you all posted....


It is weird doing this as opposed to the old fashioned way.


TC xx

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If you are going to meet someone you should speak at least briefly on the phone. Forget all that "stalker" stuff, and if you plan to meet them, then risk giving out your number, or let the woman call the guy from a public phone or block her number.

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thanks guys


if she agrees (which i dont know yet she is offline so, probably find out tomorrow) then I will drop her my IM and my mobile and put the ball in her court saying that whatever makes her feel comfortable....


I dont really want her number unless she offers it....That will have to be her call.



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Well I went for it!


and got the go ahead so, sometime next week a coffee is on the cards


so over the next few days no doubt i will reach out to the enotaloners for any potential do's and dont's


Thanks so far, its good to have you guys out there wherever you are...


TC xx

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