HoTung Posted July 14, 2008 Share Posted July 14, 2008 A girl i met through my ex has changed her profile pic on facebook to my ex and her? do you think they are dating? - I can;t help thinking something has happened between the two of them. I did ask him once whether he would go out with her and he said he wouldn;t go out with someone taller than himself. I don;t think she is his type - but then what do i know? it really shouldn;t be my business anymore but can;t help wondering. They have been away alot as a group lately. When we first broke up, I confided in her a lot but did tell her not to mention to him. I dont know Why can;t i let him go? why can;t i just remove him off my friends? people say NC helps you to move on but surely NC happens both ways - so i am letting him move on too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Godwin Posted July 14, 2008 Share Posted July 14, 2008 Dont let it beat you up. Its got to happen sooner than later. May also help you move on?!? I also suspect my ex is seeing someone, but have no proof and to be honest its none of my business anymore. I am hurting like mad at the prospect though. Given the chance I would date again so she is also entitled to. I know its not easy but we all need to deal with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeStrongBeHappy Posted July 14, 2008 Share Posted July 14, 2008 It's a given that if you break up, your ex will eventually move on and date other people. You aren't 'letting' him move on since he would do it anyway if moving on is what he wants to do. So it is a sad moment to see him with someone else, but further evidence that you are broken up and do need to move on. Perhaps it is time to take him off your friends so you quit dwelling on him. You are only hurting yourself and holding yourself back by continue to watch him on FaceBook. By watching that, you get the illusion you are still connected to him, but really if you aren't dating anymore, you need to accept that and put him behind you, including spying on his FaceBook. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoTung Posted July 14, 2008 Author Share Posted July 14, 2008 yeah i know - i keep wanting to click remove from my friends but just can;t do it Its like if i remove him thats it - our ties are cut as he broke up with me - i should expect him to be find about things - just pains me to see it happen so quickly i just never thought she was his type u're right its not me letting him go - he has gone already Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IMAbadman Posted July 14, 2008 Share Posted July 14, 2008 Delete him from your life. You need to move on. Ties are cut. You've been dismissed. Let go, move on, and succeed. Show him what he's missing. You can do it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeStrongBeHappy Posted July 14, 2008 Share Posted July 14, 2008 He could be dating her and a lot of other girls too... That's the thing about FaceBook... you think it is keeping you in contact with him, but it is just one tiny part of his world. I've never seen any good come out of spying on an ex's FaceBook/MySpace, as people use it as a means to continue to obsess about an ex and try to guess what they're up to. If you can't delete the link, then stop looking at his pages. Try only doing it once a day, then every other day, then twice a week, once a week etc. until you've weaned yourself off it. Then you can delete the connection entirely. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoTung Posted July 14, 2008 Author Share Posted July 14, 2008 Thanks Imabadman i am pretty sure he is glad to be rid off me to be honest why does love hurt so much? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IMAbadman Posted July 14, 2008 Share Posted July 14, 2008 why does love hurt so much? Because nothing worth while ever comes easy. Quit beating yourself up... it's his loss. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzanne1281 Posted July 14, 2008 Share Posted July 14, 2008 Do not, do not, do not look at your ex's facebook. Take him off your friends list, block his page on your web browser...stayyyy away from it. Trust me, I was doing great until I looked on my ex's facebook last Monday and I was in a horrible slump all last week. I didn't look on facebook all weekend and I'm already feeling better. Looking on the ex's facebook is not going to change anything no matter how many times you look. It's basically self-torture, and you want to feel better, right? I know it's so hard, but start focusing on you and think about the day when you are going to have pictures of you and someone new on your facebook. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzanne1281 Posted July 14, 2008 Share Posted July 14, 2008 Its like if i remove him thats it - our ties are cut It actually feels better when you cut the ties. And you're the one doing it so you will feel empowered. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoTung Posted July 14, 2008 Author Share Posted July 14, 2008 I am scared that if i do it i will lose every tie with him - although we are not together i still care i just saw him log onto facebook - this is the first time i seen him on-line in ages Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IMAbadman Posted July 14, 2008 Share Posted July 14, 2008 Honey you're obsessing. It's not healthy for you. Delete the chump and block his profile. You need to let go and move on. You're only prolonging the inevitable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alphabetsoup13 Posted July 14, 2008 Share Posted July 14, 2008 block the profile. plain and simple. don't think about it, just do it. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . stop reading this thread, block him now! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoTung Posted July 14, 2008 Author Share Posted July 14, 2008 What does blocking do? he isn;t contacting me so blocking will make no difference - is that right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IMAbadman Posted July 14, 2008 Share Posted July 14, 2008 BLOCKING HIM IS SO THAT HE DOESN'T CONTACT YOU AND YOU QUIT CYBER-STALKING HIM. YOU'RE OBSESSING OVER HIM....HELLO! You are continuing to hurt yourself for no reason. What like his only way to contact you is via the internet?!? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alphabetsoup13 Posted July 14, 2008 Share Posted July 14, 2008 What does blocking do? he isn;t contacting me so blocking will make no difference - is that right? that's what i thought at first, but then i realized that even if i wasn't looking at her profile, i would see her posts (and her miniature profile pic) on other people's walls. Just by seeing her wall posts and miniature profile pic set me back tremendously, so i blocked her and all her friends (we have no mutual friends). It sounds really immature but it has done wonders for my mentality. It was a particularly painful breakup (left me for another guy) and i have healed tremendously since blocking her. just do it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzanne1281 Posted July 14, 2008 Share Posted July 14, 2008 What does blocking do? he isn;t contacting me so blocking will make no difference - is that right? Blocking him will allow you to not look on his page. The awful truth is he has already cut ties with you by not contacting you. Empower yourself, get rid of him. Looking is only bringing you down further. Trust me, stop looking on his page. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoTung Posted July 14, 2008 Author Share Posted July 14, 2008 i wish i was as strong as you guys i have friends who still have him as their friend on facebook Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lapseinjudgement Posted July 14, 2008 Share Posted July 14, 2008 Im convinced facebook is an evil invention. I'm in the same situation as you for the most part. Me and my ex broke up a little over a month ago and every time i would start to feel better i would see something on facebook that would literally make me sick to my stomach and i would be thrown back into depression. It sucks to see the ex moving on but they wouldnt have broke up with us if they didnt want to move past us... (I dont even like saying that much less admitting it to myself) All i can keep telling myself to get through the pain is if it is meant to be it will be. I know it doesnt make things feel 'better' but it helps me to stop stressing over the situation. You are strong enough though. I manged to unfriend my ex on facebook (i needed to for my sanity) and i am page stalker sober for almost two weeks...Hoooray! Good luck, and remember you're not alone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoTung Posted July 14, 2008 Author Share Posted July 14, 2008 Thank you so much he girl has changed her profile pic now - so i am no longer staring him in the face Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoTung Posted July 21, 2008 Author Share Posted July 21, 2008 The girl in the pic has changed her status - she used to have single on it but has now removed it - i have an inclining they are together if not they are having fun together. There is a pic of them out on sat with some other girls - trust me he would have snogged one of them I know its nothing to do with me - should i ask? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bfla Posted July 21, 2008 Share Posted July 21, 2008 Nope. My ex did the same. Didn't put it to 'in a relationship' 'cuz she's trying to protect me no doubt. Effing rebounds. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Panda2008 Posted July 21, 2008 Share Posted July 21, 2008 i wish i was as strong as you guys i have friends who still have him as their friend on facebook So do I but I rarely see him posting anywhere. Deleting my ex from my friends list was the best thing I ever did. And it peed him off as well - he told me today it was "unnecessary" - but he was WRONG - it's very necessary to my mental wellbeing! It takes guts to press that little cross button but once you've done it you won't regret it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoTung Posted July 21, 2008 Author Share Posted July 21, 2008 yeah i keep hoovering over the x button - he doens;t have a relationship status thing on his page - when we first broke up he immediately changed his status to single but then he said he saw mine and i didn;t have one so he took it off. He has removed tagged pics of him. He did say to me once he would never date this girl cos she is taller than him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Godwin Posted July 21, 2008 Share Posted July 21, 2008 Ho Tung, stop going on that site. Its driving you mad! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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