flyingSolo Posted July 9, 2008 Share Posted July 9, 2008 First of all, thanks in advance for reading!! I have been dating this girl now for about 3-4 weeks now and it has been great. We just got back from vacation, of which she wanted me to come with her on. We have been equally affectionate and she actually told me last night while laying on the couch for a romantic evening that she liked me. You know in a smiling cute way. She is affectionate around her friends with me, public, and private. No discrimination as to where. She has told me that she had conversations about me with her friends, etc... Good ones... Oh, and we both call equally. In fact she calls me way more often now since vacation as of last weekend where I think we got much closer. My question is this. She is 24 1/2, I just turned 30. We met on match and she has been inactive for atleast two weeks. Well, I looked today and she had logged on. I have no clue as to what reason, but I have been off it for almost as long as her. Should I worry about this or am I just reading too much into it? Just last night she told me how she felt about me. I am just afraid of being hurt and don't know what to think of it. I want a relationship with her, but i know it is too soon to mention. And I definitely don't want to mention to her that I know she has been on match like a stalker or something. Any ideas? I'm not kidding, I have dated a lot of women in my life and had many relationships both long and short. So I know by the way of her actions that she is really into me as so am I. I just don't want to get hurt. And if she is a player, she is a damn good one. But I have no indications of that. Just one of those situations where things have been going so perfect that you get scared you know? Thanks!! Link to comment
SupaflyTNT Posted July 10, 2008 Share Posted July 10, 2008 Dude, she probably logged on to see if you had been logging on, ever think about that? Maybe she wanted to see if you still had your profile up? Maybe she's thinking the same thing you are right now. Blows your mind over thinking all this stuff, huh? Just go with the flow, you've only been seeing each other a little while. It's not serious yet but it might get there and then you can talk to her about her match profile. Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted July 10, 2008 Share Posted July 10, 2008 She could be on Match just to browse or she could be actively looking. If you are not exclusive then it doesn't matter how many vacations you go on together and how lovey dovey she is with you in public and private...she is still a free agent, as are you. I never understood this notion of it being "too soon" to talk about exclusivity, but yet not "too soon" to have sex, go on vacations with each other and have public displays of affection. People these days definitely do put the cart before the horse and then end up with mass confusion and insecurities. If you want to know if she is ready to commit only to you, then ask her. If the answer is no, even after all this intimacy, then at least you don't waste any more of your time. Link to comment
bmwm3 Posted July 10, 2008 Share Posted July 10, 2008 She just prob logged on to see if she got any hits... which is ok.. you know how she feels about you... putting a label on you guys can sometimes ruin it... just go with the flow and have fun... everything will work its self out.... Link to comment
HeartGoesOn Posted July 10, 2008 Share Posted July 10, 2008 I agree with "CAD." Also, if you had no problem going on vacation, and being intimate, (I assume) with her after knowing her for only 3 or 4 weeks, Why would you have a problem asking her why she is logging on to Match? Link to comment
flyingSolo Posted July 10, 2008 Author Share Posted July 10, 2008 She could be on Match just to browse or she could be actively looking. If you are not exclusive then it doesn't matter how many vacations you go on together and how lovey dovey she is with you in public and private...she is still a free agent, as are you. I never understood this notion of it being "too soon" to talk about exclusivity, but yet not "too soon" to have sex, go on vacations with each other and have public displays of affection. People these days definitely do put the cart before the horse and then end up with mass confusion and insecurities. If you want to know if she is ready to commit only to you, then ask her. If the answer is no, even after all this intimacy, then at least you don't waste any more of your time. Your right, she could be. Though, we never had sex. I stopped it before it got that far because that particular night we had a lot to drink and I told her that I did not want it to happen like this. She complimented so much that night even many other nights after that. She said that I gained so many points with her on that. And I agree with what you say about exclusitivity, but I am afraid that it has not been long enough. I am starting to feel for her more and more though. Not love, too soon, but that feeling you get when you really care. She just prob logged on to see if she got any hits... which is ok.. you know how she feels about you... putting a label on you guys can sometimes ruin it... just go with the flow and have fun... everything will work its self out.... Yeah, I hope. I agree about the label part. I wish things could be so easy. I am afraid to tell her any more than I have too soon. I agree with "CAD." Also, if you had no problem going on vacation, and being intimate, (I assume) with her after knowing her for only 3 or 4 weeks, Why would you have a problem asking her why she is logging on to Match? I know, I am just afraid about what she could say. I just feel that it is too soon and don't want her to think that I am pshyco you know? I have had so much experience with this stuff, but this one I care about. Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted July 10, 2008 Share Posted July 10, 2008 I still don't get it...she wanted you to go away with her on vacation when you had only known her 5 minutes...yet asking to be exclusive is too soon? If you do ask her and she says no, then you know that she was simply "taking you for a ride". Anybody who is going to ask someone they just started dating to go on vacation with them, goes into endless praise about the other person and is already showing affectionate signs in private AND public but then is horrified if an exclusivity talk happens is flighty (no pun intended) and you are better off finding out now if all of these overtures were really a true reflection of how she feels about you. Link to comment
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