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dress provocatively but not interested in more


amyk

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I like to get the attention of men by dressing sexy.

It may sound strange but I think that I am sexually withdrawn at the same time.

I don’t want to get into details but I have not had sex in a while.

I like it when men look at me. It turns me on to pick out outfits and I get excited when I go out wearing something provocative. I like the thrill of wearing something revealing in public. But I don’t want to pick up someone.

I just want to feel desired. I love it when men can’t help themselves and stare at me.

But I am not interested to get to know them are anything else.

Can anyone relate to this?

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It's just a case of attention grabbing or, phrased less delicately, attention wh**ing. I don't see anything wrong with it per-se though. It doesn't harm anyone. Some will say that validating yourself on how many heads you manage to turn is no way to live, which is true, but the act of dressing provocatively itself does no real harm.

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I think it's fine to dress to impress, but as long as it's appropriate. Wearing something very revealing will attract the guys, but I personally tend to have the least respect for women who wear skimpy outfits.

 

Agreed. I have little respect for someone who dresses inappropriately. She may get a stare, but certainly not a date.

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hmm... I really don't want this to come off the wrong way... but it really is a self-esteem thing... you might have a desire to be validated by men in some way, and by dressing like this you get a rush of emotions and it feels good... so you do it more.. and more...

 

Its actually a lot like operant conditioning... rat presses bar to get water.. keeps pressing bar.. etc etc...

 

so basically when you dress like that your body sends out some sort of chemical that you enjoy.. you feel good... and you've associated dressing provocatively with that chemical release... so now they're tied together!

 

As for wrong or right... hmm... I don't see anything bad about it.. the only problem I see with it is that you might not be getting the type of attention you really want... its possible you're building an image of "easy girl" or a "hoochie" and in reality you think that all these men are looking at you like some sort of goddess, but really they just think you'd be an easy lay.... and yea, some guys get the wrong idea and can start to be really forward with you and do some... questionable... things to hook up with you.... but thats not always related to how you dress...

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You want to be wanted. Everyone wants that.

 

However, do you respect yourself when you do that? It could potentially shoo off guys worth your time, and attract ones that only want one thing.

 

Don't do it to feel validated by the looks of men. Do it because you like to dress that way, not because you like the attention.

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I like to get the attention of men by dressing sexy.

It may sound strange but I think that I am sexually withdrawn at the same time.

I don’t want to get into details but I have not had sex in a while.

I like it when men look at me. It turns me on to pick out outfits and I get excited when I go out wearing something provocative. I like the thrill of wearing something revealing in public. But I don’t want to pick up someone.

I just want to feel desired. I love it when men can’t help themselves and stare at me.

But I am not interested to get to know them are anything else.

Can anyone relate to this?

 

I believe that alot of women are like this. It's an ego thing.

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annie24 Maybe you are right. I am not interested in dating anyone right now. And since I don’t like casual sex I try to feel at least sexual in this way

 

Capbit, NewPhillyGuy I don’t mind if strangers don’t respect me but also I don’t dress like a cheap … For example, I’ll wear a thin silk blouse nothing under it and unbutton a few buttons.

 

debaser_wolf I know I could get dates. But I dress sexy because it turns ME on.

 

Maverick32x I think you are right my brain is somehow conditioned to get a thrill from wearing something risk and the resulting reactions

 

What’s wrong with getting a thrill like this? I know that a lot of people seem to disapprove – and the fact that I write this may show that I wonder myself?

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Right or wrong I don't like being around women who behave that way. In part, I feel sorry for them. I learned - from my mother, my friends - when I was a teenager/early 20s that the blatant "take me now" clothes aren't as sexy as the clothing that is less revealing but fits properly and is flattering in that way. After experimenting as a teenager I knew that the drooling/leering kind of attention was not as fun or desirable as the more sincere attention where the man finds you attractive and also wants to get to know you as a person.

 

I agree that it sounds like this is an issue for you and that should be your focus....

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I wouldnt say that this is uncommon I have dealt with it in the past. I have known girls that do this but are in relationships. You already pin-pointed the issue that you like attention but just because you get attention doesnt mean that you are interested in the guy. For a guy this can be frustrating but this is just your thing. Unless you want to address your issue of seeking approval from others there isnt much that you can do with respect to this issue.

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I personally say go for it. As long as your ladies are'nt hanging out and your A is'nt on show, why not? Alot of ladies would love the confidence to go out in something revealing... as long as you do it in a classy not trashy way. My sister wears very very very low cut tops and it just does'nt look so great, mainly because her bejeebies are mahoosive. If you can pull it off, why not. I don't show cleavage because I don't have the confidence and don't like drawing attention to myself... so good for you. You are'nt a * * * * * if you don't follow anything through.

 

Like Ghost said though, be careful. People take things the wrong way.

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