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She's Changed...Not Sure if I Want Her Back Anymore

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Hi everyone. I guess I'm just venting right now. My ex broke up with me about a month ago because she needed space. She seems to have changed a lot lately. I'm not sure if I can love her anymore.


Before we broke up, we were going to go see the Nutcracker together before Christmas. We both like fanciful things like that and thought it would be fun. After we broke up we agreed to still see it together. I was starting to get really excited. Then the day before the event, she calls me and says that it would be too awkward to have me there. She decided to un-invite me and take her grandmother instead. I felt that was a pretty rude thing to do, especially on such short notice.


Then there's the whole [link removed e-mail thing. Sure she may have been very confused about her feelings. Maybe it was easier for her to convince herself that she was angry at me. I don't know. But the whole thing reeks of mind games.


Finally, today, she calls me and innocently asks how I've been doing. Then after we talk for a few minutes, she asks me if I'd buy alcohol for her and all her friends for their New Years get together(none of them are 21, but I am). It's bad enough that they're trying to use me, but they didn't even invite me to their party! What kind of pathetic, love-starved moron does she think I am? I told her that I wouldn't buy the alcohol for her and that I was really disappointed that she has so little respect for me. Then I told her to have fun sipping on her sparkling cider, and I hung up.


I can't believe what's happened to her! She used to be such a kind, considerate, and caring person. She's become so selfish and insensitive. I'm not even sure I want her back anymore. All I can do is hope that one day she wakes up and realizes what she threw away. This whole thing just makes me so angry!


I still care for her. How can you stop caring for someone after four years? I'd still like to maintain a friendship with her, but I'm seriously starting to doubt if I can ever truly love her again.


I think I'm done longing for her. I still feel a little empty inside, so I guess I'm not done healing yet, but I sure don't want to be with her if she's going to act like that.


Remember everyone, never give up your self-respect. No one is worth that much. Also, if you want to know how someone feels about you, stop listening to what they're saying and only pay attention to their actions.

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Trying to go into her mind, she probably got the impression that you have been fully fully conquered and that you are indeed a 'pathetic, love-starved moron'. She believes that she has no competetion for her place and that is why she will use you for what ever she feels like without any real respect.


You are looking into the right direction. Forget about this girl as fast as you can. She was kind and considerate because she had real respect for you. Now she thinks your insecure and she can control you because you are not of very much value at the moment because your in heartache and willing to run for miles for her.


The sooner you tell her to go away and leave you alone because you don't need her and her love, the sooner she will realise she threw something of value away and she will come running back for you. And you will have seen her true colours so the choice will be yours!


Good luck

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Hey There,


Some people just don't know a good thing when they see it! You sound like you have tried to keep the friendship and she'e taking the wrong way. Sometimes we put our hearts on a sleeve only for that person to smsah it. Don't let this girl take you for granted find someone that will apperciate you and return the good feelings. Go with your gut on this one if you feel taken for granted you proably are. Sometimes we ignore what we feel and think because we have feelings for that person and we tend to neglect the messages our brain is telling us. Hope you can heal quickly and put this girl behind you. You desevere only the best!

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Hi everyone. Thanks for the replies. I'm ready to move on with my life now. It will certainly be a lot easier after tomorrow, when I go back to school!


I'm kind of sad that our relationship had to end this way. But I think you all are right, I just need to move on and not look back. Maybe I'll try talking to her again someday when she's matured some more...



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