Tamoko Posted July 5, 2008 Share Posted July 5, 2008 Hihi. Let me just give you the basics. Well, It was the 4th of July and I haven't talked to Beth in like..3 years or so so I gave Beth a call. She is my best friend. She was the only one in my life who pushed me to do anything. Turns out shes in Pennsylvania working as the FAT CAMP [on TV] for her college courses and her major based on nutrition. She told me..she never wanted to chance what I liked but wanted to help me chance the outcome of my life. She wanted me to take care of myself, leave Schenectady, go to college, make a life for myself.. But I didn't. But it's not that I think it's too late. I know I will..I'm just comfortable right now. I was accepted to the San Fransisco Art Institute [sFAI] and how my mom NEVER told me because she didn't want me to go all the way to San. Fran. I have acknowledged that if I did go to SFAI my life would be different. I would have left Schenectady, left behind everything and started over. But my mom barred me from that. I don't want to say it's entirely her fault but it's partly her fault. I know I could have changed my life on my own but.. it's just... NO ONE besides Beth was there to push me and now she's gone I have no one to push me. Let's get do down-low. Job Info: Mcdonalds. $8.25/hr 25-35 Hours a week. Reg. amt of pay-$200.00 a week/$800.00 a month EDIT: I do not like my job. I like the people. but not to job. I am the only manager that gets under $12/hr. I am over worked, underpaid, under appreciated. But the economy sucks ass right now-how do I find a better paying job? I would rahter go to college but I don't have the smarts for a grant. From what I understand I have approximately $5000.00 in debt. Trustco-$150.00 [over withdrawal] t-mobil-$1,500.00 [Esha ran my bill up. She's SLOWLY paying for it. But I have to pay it off all at once.] Old Navy-$650.00 [From the last collection contact I got anyway..] Macys-$500.00 [They wouldn't let me pay without my ID and I lost my ID at the point in time. BASTARDS.] THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT--! From those 3 above I have not received any letters/notifications stating I still owe money. So how would I go about finding out exactly who I owe what to? I don't even know my bills! Now I have monthly bills that I know about and pay.. Elnet-$2,300.00/$50.00 a month [college loan. If I start going back to college I do NOT have to pay it off.] AT&T-$60.00 a month [cell phone~DUH.] Then I have my expenses I need to take care of.. Travel-$40.00 a week/$160.00 a month [to and from work. Cabs on sat/sunday] Misc-$20.00 a week/$80.00 a month [i'm sorry but I need to take some of my money to get myself SOMETHING. Plus it's only 10% in the end. D And I'm going to be moving upstairs soon... Rent/heat&electricity-$135.00 a month [with cable/internet included...] Food-$100.00 a month [only for ME. So should I let the boys move upstairs and I stay downstairs and not shell out the $135.00 a month or do I move upstairs to learn to live on my own and pay for my own bills..? What do I want from my life? I want to go to colege. I want to get a good job related to my college work. I want to get out of Schenectady. I want to live on my own. I want to take care of myself. I want to be around people who push me. I don't want to be in a relationship. Yeah, I said it. No more relationship. I mean, I love Nick. I've known him my whole life. We've been together over a year. But right now.. I don't think we should be together. He doesn't push me to do anything. He loves my body. But thats all I really like about him. That he loves my body [he likes the big girls] but I don't want to be with someone who wants me to be big and UNHEALTHY. I used to be big and healthy but now I'm not so sure. But I don't want to leave him just because my life isint turning out the way I want it to. I just want to get my life on track and then continue our relationship. But he's not that kind of guy. I don't want to lose what I have with him but that means I'll never make MY life. He;s doing what he wants-music. But I have no idea what I want to do......... How do I find out what I want to do? Well, sorry for the longness but I really need help. I'm so lost right now and no one here can help me. edit: I took a few aptitude tests.. one said I should be a clerical kinda' person. This is one other result. image removed Now that I figured that out... how do I go about finding a job like this? I don't even have the credentials to apply for a job like this and financially I can;t take time to go to college for a job like this. How am I supposed to do that? Link to comment
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