I need some serious LIFE help right now.

[Tamoko]

Hihi.

 

Let me just give you the basics.

 

Well, It was the 4th of July and I haven't talked to Beth in like..3 years or so so I gave Beth a call. She is my best friend. She was the only one in my life who pushed me to do anything. Turns out shes in Pennsylvania working as the FAT CAMP [on TV] for her college courses and her major based on nutrition. She told me..she never wanted to chance what I liked but wanted to help me chance the outcome of my life. She wanted me to take care of myself, leave Schenectady, go to college, make a life for myself.. But I didn't. But it's not that I think it's too late. I know I will..I'm just comfortable right now.

 

I was accepted to the San Fransisco Art Institute [sFAI] and how my mom NEVER told me because she didn't want me to go all the way to San. Fran. I have acknowledged that if I did go to SFAI my life would be different. I would have left Schenectady, left behind everything and started over. But my mom barred me from that. I don't want to say it's entirely her fault but it's partly her fault. I know I could have changed my life on my own but.. it's just... NO ONE besides Beth was there to push me and now she's gone I have no one to push me.

 

Let's get do down-low.

 

Job Info:

Mcdonalds. $8.25/hr

25-35 Hours a week.

Reg. amt of pay-$200.00 a week/$800.00 a month

 

EDIT:

I do not like my job. I like the people. but not to job. I am the only manager that gets under $12/hr. I am over worked, underpaid, under appreciated. But the economy sucks ass right now-how do I find a better paying job? I would rahter go to college but I don't have the smarts for a grant.

 

From what I understand I have approximately $5000.00 in debt.

Trustco-$150.00 [over withdrawal]

t-mobil-$1,500.00 [Esha ran my bill up. She's SLOWLY paying for it. But I have to pay it off all at once.]

Old Navy-$650.00 [From the last collection contact I got anyway..]

Macys-$500.00 [They wouldn't let me pay without my ID and I lost my ID at the point in time. BASTARDS.]

 

THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT--! From those 3 above I have not received any letters/notifications stating I still owe money. So how would I go about finding out exactly who I owe what to? I don't even know my bills!

 

Now I have monthly bills that I know about and pay..

 

Elnet-$2,300.00/$50.00 a month [college loan. If I start going back to college I do NOT have to pay it off.]

AT&T-$60.00 a month [cell phone~DUH.]

 

Then I have my expenses I need to take care of..

 

Travel-$40.00 a week/$160.00 a month [to and from work. Cabs on sat/sunday]

Misc-$20.00 a week/$80.00 a month [i'm sorry but I need to take some of my money to get myself SOMETHING. Plus it's only 10% in the end. D

 

And I'm going to be moving upstairs soon...

 

Rent/heat&electricity-$135.00 a month [with cable/internet included...]

Food-$100.00 a month [only for ME.

 

So should I let the boys move upstairs and I stay downstairs and not shell out the $135.00 a month or do I move upstairs to learn to live on my own and pay for my own bills..?

 

 

What do I want from my life?

 

I want to go to colege.

I want to get a good job related to my college work.

I want to get out of Schenectady.

I want to live on my own.

I want to take care of myself.

I want to be around people who push me.

I don't want to be in a relationship.

 

Yeah, I said it. No more relationship. I mean, I love Nick. I've known him my whole life. We've been together over a year. But right now.. I don't think we should be together. He doesn't push me to do anything. He loves my body. But thats all I really like about him. That he loves my body [he likes the big girls] but I don't want to be with someone who wants me to be big and UNHEALTHY. I used to be big and healthy but now I'm not so sure. But I don't want to leave him just because my life isint turning out the way I want it to. I just want to get my life on track and then continue our relationship.

 

But he's not that kind of guy. I don't want to lose what I have with him but that means I'll never make MY life. He;s doing what he wants-music. But I have no idea what I want to do.........

 

How do I find out what I want to do?

 

 

 

Well, sorry for the longness but I really need help. I'm so lost right now and no one here can help me.

 

 

edit: I took a few aptitude tests.. one said I should be a clerical kinda' person.

 

This is one other result.

 

image removed

 

Now that I figured that out... how do I go about finding a job like this? I don't even have the credentials to apply for a job like this and financially I can;t take time to go to college for a job like this. How am I supposed to do that?

[Whiplash Girl Child]

I think the first thing you should do is stop relying on others to "push" you. Your drive, motivation, and efforts should come from yourself, and if not, then you'll end up nowhere.

 

It's good that you've identified some of your wants and goals.

 

Now you have to take active steps to pursuing them. Push? Don't expect it from anyone but yourself. Good luck.

[Tamoko]

I push myself as far as I can go.

 

I push myself to work everyday because I need money. Every morning I plan on sleeping it. I never check the time. If i ha[[en to wake up to catch the bus for work, i'll go to work. If not i'll be late and not care.

 

I.. havent really had more then one decent meal in the past week. It's not that im purposuly not eating..i'm just not hungry. And when I am I eat just a little of something. just a LITTLE. I was sick a week ago so i'm used to not being hungry, I guess.

 

..

 

I think it's...like..

 

If I can't see a plan ahead of me I can;t get motivated.

 

But what I would LIKE to know about is how I get all my debt information? Where can I seek counseling [for free?] or aid or something!

 

I want to write to SFAI and let them know that happened with my college and their accepting me and such-see if they can do anything for me. I still have my portfolio..

 

I have to take some college classes in ART. I can't draw the way they like it unless i'm in that actual setting.

 

My only skill [that I know of] is art. And I want to be an artist.. but..not for a living. I'm good, i consider it my profession. But it's not what I want to LIVE and SURVIVE on.

 

how am I supposed to find out what it is I want to do exactly? or what exactly I would be suited to do?

[Multiplicity]

But what I would LIKE to know about is how I get all my debt information? Where can I seek counseling [for free?] or aid or something!

 

If you get a credit report done, it will tell you how much you owe and from whom. You will have to find another way to get contact information, though, but you can do that by using a search engine or through the yellow pages. FreeCreditReport (use google since this site does not allow me to post an url oddly) is a good way to find out without paying a dime. Ultimately, you need to contact the companies you owe money to directly.

 

I don't know where to seek counseling, especially free, but you might want to try to look for local non-profit organizations in your area and see if you can find any organizations that offer some sort of career counseling. There usually is something along those lines for young people.

 

I want to write to SFAI and let them know that happened with my college and their accepting me and such-see if they can do anything for me. I still have my portfolio..

 

You should write them. You have nothing to lose except a piece of paper, an envelope, and a stamp.

 

My only skill [that I know of] is art. And I want to be an artist.. but..not for a living. I'm good, i consider it my profession. But it's not what I want to LIVE and SURVIVE on.

 

If you don't want to depend on art to make a living, you will definitely need to find another passion you could enjoy and make money with. Is there anything else that interests you, for a job at least?

 

how am I supposed to find out what it is I want to do exactly? or what exactly I would be suited to do?

 

Need to consider what things you like to do and/or good at. Sometimes, you might have to take a risk to see if you truly want to find something. I sure took one myself by joining the US Air Force. This ties in with the counseling you wish to seek. Counselors can help you to find what you want to do.

[Tamoko]

Well, I'm pregnant.

 

o_o

 

I have nothing to say about it.

 

For now.

 

Let me find out more...

 

>_________________>;

[Emernate]

If the creditors are not calling you and you don't know how to get ahold of them, don't wake them up. Instead work to get the ones that are calling you paid off. Focus on them one at a time, otherwise it's just going to be crazy with all of them calling you all of the time. The way I would do it is pay off trustco first, then macy's and old navy.. then t-moble. If you can, put the student loan on deferment.

 

For moving upstairs.. i wouldn't. Although it would be nice to have a place of your own, you don't really need the extra costs

 

For finding a new job, there are a lot of possibilities. Temping to fill in the other days when you are not working. Housework, working retail, delivering pizza's at night, babysitting. It doesn't have to be steady work, just bring in a few extra bucks at the end of the day. Who knows.. maybe you will find out what you want to do for a career while working one of these jobs.