teema Posted July 5, 2008 Share Posted July 5, 2008 I guess I've been feeling lonely. I guess it was the alcohol. But, now I feel absolutely horrible after having a one night stand with this random guy I met a club last night. And...to make matters worse, I called my ex boyfriend afterward balling my eyes out. I realized what I was doing was stupid, so I said I just that I wanted to say hi. It's been almost 5 months already since the breakup and I thought that I was over him and moving on with my life, but I just can't stop being in love with him. And, it hurts so much. I feel even more stupid after hooking up with that guy lasting night. I think that during the act, I kind of thought that it was my exboyfriend. Now I feel dirty, used and unloved. My exboyfriend is living with his new girlfriend now. The past week has been hell between us. I did NC for a month and finally responded to a phone call after he sounded sick. During the conversation, he said that it bothered him that I don't respond and that I took him off my myspace friends list because he loves me a lot. I didn't know what to say to that. So, I said nothing. I feel so lonely and I can't stop crying and I just want to roll up in a ball and die. I jus want him to love me again and not another woman and wnt to be with me. How can it still hurt this much after 5 months? This is the worst feeling in the world and I would never wish it on anyone. Link to comment
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