Castration

[CynicalGuitarist]

Extreme, yes. However, I think this might solve a lot of my problems. Especially my problems with masturbation and desire for a woman (almost inevitably, I fall for the ones that are way out of my league. sorry, it's something I just can't control). I would be free of the pain of having my stability and security turned to hell by some masquerading she-devil succubus. It's not like I can lower my standards manually (as I'm firmly against lying to a woman, telling her she's "beautiful" and "ms. right" just 'cause I can't get any better outta desparation). I'd be free from my Freudian-esque obssession with sex (ironic enough, I'm a virgin). Also, I would probably rid myself of any sort of distraction (females make up at least 50 percent of "distraction" that made college hellish for me) and have the drive to succeed.

 

On the other hand, I do want kids, but I'm trying to think if they'll be anything like me (disgruntled and misanthropic) then I don't wanna bring them into a world that they're gonna hate. Full of lies, deceit, hatred, pollution, aggression, war, and control... it's a tough quandry.

 

Well, hey, I'm sure 90 percent of pets out there are castrated anyways... there's 6 billion people on the planet as is; how many more would we need?

 

I'm not sure if I'm gonna actually do it or not... I'm just planting seeds here (pun not intended).

[Cognitive_Canine]

well, if you do castrate yourself, I can gaurantee that you'll never get laid. Which, even though your drive will go down, your mental want for a woman will not.

 

Also, I doubt any woman would stick around because you had a "good personality". Women have sexual needs too.

 

Dude, just stay cool for a while and keep working on getting yourself a girl. Don't do anything drastic here. A penis is a gift, not a curse.

[CynicalGuitarist]

well, if you do castrate yourself, I can gaurantee that you'll never get laid. Which, even though your drive will go down, your mental want for a woman will not.

 

Also, I doubt any woman would stick around because you had a "good personality". Women have sexual needs too.

 

Dude, just stay cool for a while and keep working on getting yourself a girl. Don't do anything drastic here. A penis is a gift, not a curse.

 

'tis not my phallis that's the problem. It's my balls. I mean, we castrate pets so they don't create love children or pee on the furniture... I guess I could always find women who are good friends.

 

If all I'm ever gonna get is rejection from women... why even have semen other than to pump it out into a sock?

 

Hell, I've known since day 1 that my personality and kindness isn't gonna get me anywhere either.

[Cognitive_Canine]

well, with that attitude it sure as heck wont'.

 

All you need is that one girl. Don't let the others who rejected you hold you back.

 

You're only 20, man. You have no idea what is out there.

[Mindy1607307824]

I agree. You're only 20..

[CynicalGuitarist]

well, with that attitude it sure as heck wont'.

 

All you need is that one girl. Don't let the others who rejected you hold you back.

 

You're only 20, man. You have no idea what is out there.

 

See, people have told me these kinds of things with movies that aren't true and other fairy-tales... and while they're well-intentioned, they're simply not true. Some guys DO end up alone (it's in the movies, but scarce... ever seen "Being John Malkovich"?)

 

Sure, I've fallen for women and went in with a "don't let the others tear me apart!" attitude... and got rejected anyways. Stuck back at home masturbating for the 23478489532th time. It gets really tiresome and tedious... I just want to find a way for it to STOP.

 

I'll give myself 5-7 years before I make it final... maybe less if the depression gets too detrimental to deal with.

[ProtestTheHero]

I think for some people, attitude becomes a little irrelevant over time. You can approach the same problem from different angles, perspectives, and attitudes and never solve it. Once you've done all of that stuff it's hard to consider it changing. Women want a certain type of guy. When you don't fit the mold, you adapt.

 

Castration is a little extreme though, lol. I wouldn't do anything that resulted in such permanent results. If you want to lose your desire for a woman, ask what it is she can do that you cannot do for yourself. You can achieve orgasm solo, you can have meaningful relationships with males that cover the friendship aspects of it, and you can avoid all the other obligations and uninteresting parts of most relationships. I gotta tell ya, I don't particularly miss 1 hr long convos of how tough school is, of how petty other girls are, etc. etc. etc. It's boring after a while.

 

Once you list it like that the appeal dies down quite a bit.

[lenni]

I would be free of the pain of having my stability and security turned to hell by some masquerading she-devil succubus. It's not like I can lower my standards manually (as I'm firmly against lying to a woman, telling her she's "beautiful" and "ms. right" just 'cause I can't get any better outta desparation). I'd be free from my Freudian-esque obssession with sex (ironic enough, I'm a virgin).

 

so does the fact that i'm a female automatically make me a "she-devil succubus"? or is that only reserved for the attractive ones? you say personality isn't going to get you anywhere, but it apparently isn't going to get women much of anywhere with you either.

 

nobody has the ability to "turn your stability and security to hell" unless you let them do that to you. maybe if you worked on your view of women as evil seductresses out to torment you then your relationships with them (as people) would improve and ultimately lead to mutually satisfying sex?

 

it is honorable that you wouldn't be deceptive/manipulative to get sex. but women like sex too, and there are plenty of women out there who don't always only want to have sex with someone who is "mr right" or who tells her she is beautiful and "mrs. right". so you might be able to have sex with someone who isn't looking for a committed relationship with you but does want to have a good time.

 

i don't think it is ironic that you have the obsession given that you are a virgin. i wonder if you might be less obsessed if you weren't?

 

as for castration, yes, it does seem extreme. i definitely think you'll get your chance to have sex in your life - and man what a wonderful thing it is! damn, it's our birth right! and it seems like it could be a HUGE regret down the road.

[ProtestTheHero]

Yeah, just don't fret too much about sex. When I was a virgin I was obsessed about it, but once I lost mine it really wasn't that enjoyable -- nothing I hadn't experienced on my own already.

[CynicalGuitarist]

ask what it is she can do that you cannot do for yourself.

 

-Having someone to simply cuddle and watch a movie with

-Looking into her eyes and getting a natural rush

-ACTUAL sex (instead of using my hand to replace a human counterpart

-Someone to roll around on the grass with

-Someone to offer a kind of yin to my yang

-Having someone to kiss

-Having someone to simply look at the stars with and ponder

-Being with someone who represents my personification of beauty

 

and there's definitely more. Without my balls or sex drive, I won't obtain any of that at all, true, but then again at least I won't care about what I'm gonna miss out on.

[Imprecision]

Usually, I don't talk about my sex life. Nor do I respond to heavy, serious posts. (I read this forum to relax and to have fun.)

 

But you need help. And I can help you.

 

Extreme, yes. However, I think this might solve a lot of my problems. Especially my problems with masturbation and desire for a woman (almost inevitably, I fall for the ones that are way out of my league.

 

You must learn to be happy by yourself. Don't look for fulfillment in a woman.

 

My advice will differ from most commentators.

 

Keys:

 

1. Women are not essential to happiness. In fact, many people are happier without women.

 

a. Most people will say "Don't worry, you'll find a woman eventually." Perhaps this is true. But you aren't even close to this level. Learn to be happy by yourself first.

 

2. "Being yourself" is not enough, if "being yourself" means complacency. You must actively improve yourself.

 

a. If you want to live the good life, you must improve yourself. Let's say you've just watched "Indiana Jones." You're inspired to become an adventurer. It's not enough just to dream about adventures. First, you must study. You must study outdooring. You must study ancient cultures. You must learn a foreign language. Then, you can become an adventurer. (If you've done your work, adventures come to you all the time when you travel.)

 

b. Let's say you just watched "Casablanca." You want romance. It's not enough to dream about romance. You must study how to become a consummate gentleman. You must memorise romantic poetry, read romantic literature, etc. You must also learn all sorts of lifestyle trivia, such as the different types of wine and beer, so that you can become the person you want to be.

 

c. Picking up women is a skill like any other. Please refer to my thread "Views on Pick-up Techniques" in the Dating forum. First, you must study. You study either by tagging along social friends and observing them. Or you read self-improvement manuals on good conversations. Next, you must practice in bars.

 

As a kid, I was awkward and self-conscious. I'm smooth and social today. The transformation took place during one summer vacation in Hong Kong. I had very few friends back there (since I immigrated to Canada at a young age). Since I had no one to hang out with, I went to bars everyday. I talked to everyone. Whenever I saw an attractive woman, I figured I had nothing to lose. So I talked to her. I can approach women effectively and fearlessly today because I practised.

 

Advice:

 

1. Find a hobby and run with it. I'm really into tea and coffee culture right now. If you're interested, please pm me. We can study together. (All interested parties welcome.)

2. I recommend "How to Talk to Anyone" and "The Art of Mingling" to everyone. The former you can download from Kazaa. These manuals really work.

3. Don't even try to pick up women yet. Just make friends. For instance, when you're in a class, pretend you're confused. Then make the girl next to you tutor you. Or invite her to a study group. This is very easy. Just practice talking to girls.

4. When you're ready for relationships, read a pick-up manual or two. And then practise.

[CynicalGuitarist]

so does the fact that i'm a female automatically make me a "she-devil succubus"? or is that only reserved for the attractive ones? you say personality isn't going to get you anywhere, but it apparently isn't going to get women much of anywhere with you either.

 

nobody has the ability to "turn your stability and security to hell" unless you let them do that to you. maybe if you worked on your view of women as evil seductresses out to torment you then your relationships with them (as people) would improve and ultimately lead to mutually satisfying sex?

 

Well, the ones I'm attracted to have been like that, and I've never once had feelings for a "plain-jane" kind of girl no matter how much of a chance I have. By succubi, I mean that purely symbolically. I've met lots of women with fantastic personalities, but sadly, I just wasn't attracted to them. As much as I tried to force it, I couldn't force any sort of spark to come out. It was hard and I feel bad for it for this day, but I didn't "get" with them 'cause I didn't wanna have to air out my dirty laundry later and get called a "pig" anyways.

 

I fight and fight and fight to keep from falling for women *especially 'cause I only fall for the ones that are way outta my league* and keep them from averting my mind and tearing my sanity apart, but to no avail. It's a very misunderstood, frustrating, irritating state of mind.

 

Believe me, men have tried to get me to sleep with ugly, desperate women. I know I should've, but it just doesn't feel right to me. As much as I wanna force myself to do it outta experience, I can't bring myself to it. I know, I live a horrible contradictory lifestyle and am a generally awful person, but dreams of "better things" that my family, relatives, and sometimes friends ridicule me for are all that's keeping my balls intact.

 

I was thinking about getting an escort, and although they aren't saints, at least they're honest in their lifestyle. However, over time, it would just be too damn expensive.

[CynicalGuitarist]

Your advice is very logical and practical, but I've been through all that (believe it or not) and it simply DOES NOT work. I'm NOT an antisocial guy, I'd like to think of myself in the happy medium. I have hobbies. I have friends that are girls. It's not that being single SUCKS... it's just... old. Same ol' jack every single day. Boring. No chemistry. No luck. Same everything. It's all very tedious and monotonous.

 

It's too late anyways. I've fallen for someone who most likely doesn't like me and already has 30 million guys that want her. What makes me any better just 'cause I wanna talk with her and get to know the "real" her instead of constant physical contact which all the others do. She probably doesn't care, and I don't blame her. I'm horrible, and she deserves so much better. Alas, that does not kill off the true desire I still have when I look at her eyes.

 

I wish I had enough dough to travel to another country to live there. America sucks as do most of the women around here.

 

Again, I give myself about 5 years... thus, I can still enjoy the feeling of my ape-milk coming out for a lil bit more.

[thejigsup]

How come when women reject you because they are "out of your league" they are she-devils, but when you reject a woman because you are not attracted to her you are being virtuously honest because you don't like to lie. I smell the old double standard here. I'm sure you are a nice guy in many ways, but until you lose THAT attitude, you will get nowhere with either women or life in general.

[CynicalGuitarist]

How come when women reject you because they are "out of your league" they are she-devils, but when you reject a woman because you are not attracted to her you are being virtuously honest because you don't like to lie. I smell the old double standard here. I'm sure you are a nice guy in many ways, but until you lose THAT attitude, you will get nowhere with either women or life in general.

 

I didn't say they were she-devils because of that, but because they outright lie and say "I don't care about looks!" and lead me on in the first place instead of simply ignoring me like they truly want to. I'm not self-righteous in the least, but at least I don't lead women on in the first place.

 

Yeah, I have high standards. I honestly wish I didn't, but being attracted to someone isn't a choice. I know I'm not a good person for it, and don't deserve it, but the desire still won't go away. It hurts too hard, so I'm still seriously considering castration in order to be free from those desires.

[girl friend]

First off, i wouldn't recommend castrating yourself... you might as well get it surgically done properly... it is a v simple procedure, as anyone who has seen the film Hard Candy will back me up on, but even if u are an experienced self-injurer i wouldn't recommend it..

Heck even if u are a licensed surgeon i wouldn't recommend self-castration!

 

-Having someone to simply cuddle and watch a movie with

-Looking into her eyes and getting a natural rush

-ACTUAL sex (instead of using my hand to replace a human counterpart

-Someone to roll around on the grass with

-Someone to offer a kind of yin to my yang

-Having someone to kiss

-Having someone to simply look at the stars with and ponder

-Being with someone who represents my personification of beauty

 

and there's definitely more. Without my balls or sex drive, I won't obtain any of that at all, true, but then again at least I won't care about what I'm gonna miss out on.

 

Secondly, all the things you just listed are things you can get from a non sexual relationship except the actual sex. so without sex u can obtain true friendship, a v real connection, etc with someone. Mb it is a problem for you that all you think of is sex... and not on the emotional connection

Have you ever had a girl friend or come close?

 

I don't think having the snip will solve all your problems, and it is non-reversable. How about counselling instead?

[EQD]

um.. i think with castration (look up unic) you will probably lose your ability to gain or maintain an erection.

and people naturally seek the companionship of other humans.. especially in an intimate fashion (not just sex, i really mean intimate) so cutting off your nuts may kill your sex drive but it wont kill your desire for a mate. if that makes any sense.

[BeStrongBeHappy]

Ridding yourself of your testicles may reduce sex drive, but it will in no way reduce your desire for love or human contact with females. It just means you won't be able to have sex. So you are overestimating what this will do for you, and WAY underestimating the problems this will cause.

 

Honey, it's not normal to want to castrate yourself. This could be a biochemical imbalance in your brain leading to these kinds of thoughts. Please get yourself to a doctor ASAP and talk about this with the doctor. It is possible that you are either bi-polar or schizophrenic and need medication, not castration, as the solution to this problem.

[ProtestTheHero]

Yeah, as someone else mentioned, all the stuff you listed can be obtained by friendship. I've dated a few women, and I don't think any of them would have been too thrilled about rolling in the grass together, lol.

 

I think your idea of a relationship is a tad romanticized simply because you haven't had one. Since I have had one, my own desire for female companionship is relatively low because all of them were fairly bad breakups, all of them relied on me to bring the humor and interest because they thought bringing their looks was enough. It was boring. Most relationships fail. Most suck. Every now and then you luck out and meet someone, so it's really not worth putting this much focus on.

 

The great thing about this is, like imprecision says, when you focus on you -- the things you like, enjoy, and do -- and become either skilled or knowledgable in one of these things, you become interesting. You become happy with yourself as you improve. Your attitude changes and people will gravitate to you. The ones who constantly focus on getting the girl, getting laid etc. etc. are the ones who have the hardest time accomplishing it.

[CynicalGuitarist]

face it.. your ugly.

 

BAH! You think I didn't already know that!?!?!?

[girl friend]

BAH! You think I didn't already know that!?!?!?

 

Hey mate just hang in there yeh?

I'm sure a lot of women would love a romantic guitarist... with balls...

[15 Storeys High]

Same ol' jack every single day. Boring. No chemistry. No luck. Same everything. It's all very tedious and monotonous.

 

I'm horrible, and she deserves so much better.

 

America sucks as do most of the women around here.

 

I know I'm not a good person for it, and don't deserve it.

 

This.....^^^^ is your problem.

[ZeldaPrinces]

Originally posted by Cynicalguitarist

Having someone to simply cuddle and watch a movie with

-Looking into her eyes and getting a natural rush

-ACTUAL sex (instead of using my hand to replace a human counterpart

-Someone to roll around on the grass with

-Someone to offer a kind of yin to my yang

-Having someone to kiss

-Having someone to simply look at the stars with and ponder

-Being with someone who represents my personification of beauty

 

and there's definitely more. Without my balls or sex drive, I won't obtain any of that at all, true, but then again at least I won't care about what I'm gonna miss out on.

 

It angers me that you say without your balls or sex drive you won't obtain any of this. I never want to have sex but the idea of all the rest feels amazing except the personification of beauty piece.

Don't assume all girls are the same. Perhaps most, but in that case use the word most instead of I wont ever obtain any of that.

To some girls, sure there aren't many, but some, the idea of only a romantic relationship sounds ideal. For example, have you heard of Asexual? It is a person who does not experience sexual attraction. Many girls are this way, one in a thousand people are. So don't doubt people out that quickly.

 

Don't say that all women care about looks. That is so untrue and I am attractive and certainly not needy. And the I could not care less about looks coz I see the body as only a case for the amazing soul inside. The personality is all that matters to ME. Not many are similar but there are quite afew who are.

 

Originally posted by BeStrongBeHappy

Honey, it's not normal to want to castrate yourself. This could be a biochemical imbalance in your brain leading to these kinds of thoughts. Please get yourself to a doctor ASAP and talk about this with the doctor. It is possible that you are either bi-polar or schizophrenic and need medication, not castration, as the solution to this problem.

 

This is also very offensive to those who have been castrated. Not all those who do it see it as 'bi polar or schizophrenic' behaviour. For some, it is so escape the huge focus everyone has on sex. I myself hate the idea of sex, but I am not stopping anyone else from having it. However, it does not mean I am bi-polar or anything of the sort and I would really consider castration ( but female version ) mainly due to the fact that I wish for a world free of gender because of the overall focus on sex and sexual identity and 'putting out' especially in this new generation.

 

Also, many men look to castration because they see the penis as a weapon, that is used in rape and it is a desire in which they can't resist, similar, it sounds, to CynicalGuitarist.

 

CynicalGuitarist, why do you focus so much on appearance? Do not assume all attractive girls are * * * * * es. If you are ugly, which we don't know, who cares, not all girls are uninterested in a guy who isn't good looking.

Perhaps try to aim for girls who Aren't as attractive or aren't as focused on sex as a primary goal.

[prettily]

That does seem a little extreme, but really, when I think about what you're saying, I get it. I kind of feel the same way (as much as I can, being a woman, and all). I sort of have a teeny-tiny obsession with sex and all things related, but I don't have it (not for a few years now). Other people are too much of a hassle sometimes.

[jengh]

you intrigue me...

maybe there's a med you could take to reduce sex drive?