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How long do you wait or have waited to/for call? (men & women)

BetterKarma

By BetterKarma
in Dating Advice

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BetterKarma Community Regular

BetterKarma

Posted
Posted

This stemmed from another thread.

 

I was just wondering how long do you (males) wait to call the girl for a first date?

 

And this goes for the ladies as well, how long have you waited for a guy to call after you gave him your number? Or if you got their number.

 

A girl friend of mine met a guy at a wedding and this guy was extremely interested in her. Got her number on Saturday and yet, still waited until Wed or Thurs to call her.

 

I asked a male friend of mine how long he waits to call and he said, without hesitation, 3-4 days. I asked why? And he said "because the times I didn't, it didn't work out so well."

 

This past weekend, I gave my number to a guy I was set up with by friends. We met Saturday and he asked my friends to hook him up with me. I told them to give him my number Sunday night. And I never got a call.

 

I just don't understand why men and women feel the need to wait "x" amount of days before calling the girl or guy. It's not like we don't know the "rules" and by not calling until "x" amount of days, it looks like you are playing games.

 

All opinions are welcome!

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george237 Enthusiast

george237

Posted
Posted

It depends on when I want to take her out. I will give a few examples. I meet a girl and get her number on a sat night.

 

I want to take her out the following thurs - call monday

 

Friday - call Tues

 

Sat - call Wed

 

The next weekend - I would probably call wed or thurs to say hi and touch base the following week.

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BetterKarma Community Regular

BetterKarma

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I don't understand all these "rules" anyway. If you like someone, call them.

 

I met a guy and gave him my number and he called the next day. I thought that was FANTASTIC. I am not a fan of "waiting 3 days". I dunno...I just don't get all that!

 

Just my opinion. If you like them - CALL.

 

 

I feel the same way! The guy that calls me the next day is the guy I would be more interested in. The guy that calls me after a few days, I would be wary of.

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BetterKarma Community Regular

BetterKarma

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if i really felt like i had a spark and she was attractive, i'll call the next day. but when i get her number i usually work that out.

 

That's exactly my point. If the girl gives you her number, chances are she would like to hear from you.

 

However, I know there are exceptions to the rule but generally speaking, if the girl gives you her number, she wants you to call her and set up a date.

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BetterKarma Community Regular

BetterKarma

Posted
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Posted
It depends on when I want to take her out. I will give a few examples. I meet a girl and get her number on a sat night.

 

I want to take her out the following thurs - call monday

 

Friday - call Tues

 

Sat - call Wed

 

The next weekend - I would probably call wed or thurs to say hi and touch base the following week.

 

George, do you always follow these rules? What if you really hit it off with someone? Are they're exceptions? Or is it a discipline issue?

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ghost69 Mentor

ghost69

Posted
Posted
That's exactly my point. If the girl gives you her number, chances are she would like to hear from you.

 

However, I know there are exceptions to the rule but generally speaking, if the girl gives you her number, she wants you to call her and set up a date.

 

exactly why i don't waste time. i want to know sooner than later if we are compatible or not. cause if not, i'm just wasting my time when i could be finding someone else.

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george237 Enthusiast

george237

Posted
Posted
George, do you always follow these rules? What if you really hit it off with someone? Are they're exceptions? Or is it a discipline issue?

 

If I meet someone early in the night and we spend the whole night talking I will usually send a text the next day saying I had a really great time last night talk to you soon..

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ShuShu Fontana Collaborator

ShuShu Fontana

Posted
Posted

I met an amazing man who seemed very interested in me, asked me for my number and I'm STILL waiting for him to call. That was 2 months ago.

 

](*,)

 

He either has a girlfriend, lost his phone, or was only interested in getting in my pants that night and since he didn't, he's on to the next one.

 

I asked my guy friends what the deal was and that was their assesment: he was looking to get laid, played the "can I have your number" game to make it look like they wanted more, didn't get it, and carried on.

 

One of these guy friends said he would wait 3 days to call a girl so as to not seem desperate, one day if she was really cute and he was really into her. If we're interested in you we're not going to think you're desperate for calling us under a week.

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wurth_skidder Apprentice

wurth_skidder

Posted
Posted

Where do guys learn these rules? The only rule I've ever lived by is to call a girl and talk on the phone once for every time I see her for the first few dates. This rule is perfect for not seeming needy. Waiting three days doesn't make guys seem less needy, it just makes them seem like they have a stupid rule to play a stupid dating game.

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george237 Enthusiast

george237

Posted
Posted
Where do guys learn these rules? The only rule I've ever lived by is to call a girl and talk on the phone once for every time I see her for the first few dates. This rule is perfect for not seeming needy. Waiting three days doesn't make guys seem less needy, it just makes them seem like they have a stupid rule to play a stupid dating game.

 

It works for me. And to be honest I have no desire to call the next day. I base my phone call off of how many days notice I think is needed prior the date night.

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ycmanvs Rising Star

ycmanvs

Posted
Posted

I would wait a reasonable amount of time. Within a week, I would think the guy would be able to find the time to call me and chat. Unless, he is out of town or something and has a good reason to wait longer. Of course, I prefer it when guys call the next day, but I think a week is pretty reasonable.

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IMAbadman Contributor

IMAbadman

Posted
Posted
If a man does not call me within 3 days I don't go out with him again. I figure how interested can he be? If you want to see her, let her know it.

 

Negative.

 

If I'm interested enough to ask for her digits, that right there demonstrates I want to see her and I’m interested enough to call her for a date. Now if that date doesn’t happen in 3 days and she says NO because I broke her 3-day rule… oh well, your loss honey.

 

Come on that’s just as silly as saying I have to wait 3 days before I call her once I get the digits.

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Sprinter79 Newbie

Sprinter79

Posted
Posted

I agree that its a bit of an ask ringing on friday afternoon seeing what she's up to later that night, you do need to give the girl time to get ready

 

If you like someone, let them know. We all need to be wanted, and want to be needed

 

If you ring them 8 times a day though, that's a bit creepy haha

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