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How Many Times Can You Fall In Love In 1 Lifetime?


starblubber
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Well 5 years ago I was in a very serious relationship with this girl, we dated for 3 years and we were totally 100% in love. Her parents ended up moving to Brazil and I live in Canada. I followed her down there months later only to find out she was cheating on me with some guy down there so we broke up and I came back home devestated.

 

5 years after that I lived with depression and only saw a few girls here and there but I couldn't give my heart away to anyone no matter how hrd I tried. Then I met Ashley, we were friends for a few years and it grew into a serious relationship and we lived together for 7 months but she recently broke up with me for her ex as oyu might have read in other posts of mine on here.

 

I know I loved her with all my heart.

My question is how many more times can I give my heart away when everytime I do it just gets hurt over and over. I'm turning 26 this summer, I know I'm still fairly young but is it supposed to take another 5 years before i meet someone I can give my heart to and then what happens if the same thing happens all over again.

 

All I want is a nice girl who I can love that will love me just as much and spend the rest of my life with. I'm a hopless romantic.

 

How many times can I fall in love in 1 lifetime before it loses all meaning?

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I feel the same way When none of your relationships worked, especially the ones you tried so hard and wanted to work so bad, it is hard to think about even taking a risk again with your heart. It sucks that we just never know or have any predictablility what is going to happen in a relationship.

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Hi starblubber and kesea,

 

I am touched by your postings. I am sorry that both of you had to go through all this and I hope that you will meet Mrs Right (starblubber) or Mr Right (kesea) some time very soon.

 

I just want to ask you: don't give up! Give love always a chance, especially when it feels ever so good. I know it's so hard, but you just have to keep trying. Love is precious and powerful thing. If feels so great to love a person and being loved. It's just because of that, why it hurts when you find out that this was not the 'one'. But that just doesn't mean you shouldn't keep trying.

 

I wish both of you so much luck and happiness in your life. Accept your pain for now, but don't close your eyes. There's someone for everyone out there ... good hunting!

 

~ SwingFox ~

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The heart is an organ just like all the other organs in our body. We run or think or see over and over. Why would it be any different with falling in love...let me qualify that a bit:

 

If you are already in a committed relationship, then you should be careful about male/female "friendships," as they often turn into something else with a little mood lighting and some champagne and oh ...Valentine's day is coming soon, isn't it?

 

Be careful about who you love, there are a lot of independent women out there who conduct themselves with a lot of sexality and only a little heart...just like men have always done.

 

Maybe check out girls who are younger and lack all the worldliness that makes us hard after a while.

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Thanks for all your words and advice SwingFox

Even though nothing anybody says right now really helps or makes me feel better for more than 2 seconds I know when I get through this and look back I'll owe you and the rest of enotalone a really big thanks for being there for me You guys are good people and I have alot of respect for you guys for helping others out with our broken hearts. You guys do a lot of good.

 

Right now though I feel like my whole entire universe dropped out and this pain is so unbearable and I just can't imagine feeling like this much longer. This pain is so intense! See I've been here once before and I know I got through it but for the life of me I can't remember how I did or if it even felt this bad. That whole time after my first serious breakup is like a blur and is fuzzy when I think back. I remember being super depressed for about a year afterwards, I just can't imagine feeling depressed like that for another year or so.

 

I read everybodys posts and see there going through similar stuff as me or have at one point and it makes me feel better in a way knowing other people are feeling the same way as me and can relate or have made it through this. But then I think about how many people out there are like my most recent ex and can be so careless with somebodys feelings and hurt them and play with there feelings intentionally and lie to them and not even care. It scares me cause I never want this to happen again cause I really don't think I could make it through this again. I don't want to shut my heart off but how can I not? Even if I don't want to won't it happen naturally as a defense mechanismn? Like putting up a so called invisible wall? I put up a wall after my first ex and it took 5 years to knock down and give this most recent ex a key. See I know I'm an attractive guy and lot's of girls like me but I'm tired of dating for the sake of dating but I do want a meaningful relationship. I really feel like Ashley was my lst chance in a way. I hope not but that's just how I feel. Has anyone else on here been in love more than twice, I mean pure genuine with all your heart and soul love? I need some hope

 

See the place I work doesn't open up for 1 more month so I have nothing to keep my mind occupied for majority of the time and I'm sure thinking too much is making it worse. I've had a few friends over the past 8 days but they work in the days and have school at nights so they can't come over too often and my family is allready starting to get annoyed with me talking so much, I think that's why I've been posting on here so I don't keep whining to them about everything. The weather outside is too cold to go for walks and stuff -40 with the windchill today. Anyone have any suggestions of stuff I can do to keep busy at home that will actually help?

Is there any kind of medicine or anything to help me out if I still feel this way a couple months down the road? I just can't keep feeling like this and I know I can't.

 

Thanks for listening

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Sisterlynch your the only person who's told me to check out girls that are younger. Is dating younger girls really wise? In my own experience the younger girls don't really know what they want, like I look around everywhere and I see girls that are 18 to 23 years old and there in serious relationships for a year or 2 and think they know what they want and everything seems to be going good but then something happens inside of them and they get rid of there boyfriends and start paryting around playing the fields and stuff. Not all girls but most from my experience. Most people lately are telling me to go for older girls more like my age 25 or 26 instead of the 18 to 23 age but it's hard to find girls at this age that arn't taken that I could click with that don't have tons of baggage already or looking to marry a doctor or a lawyer. It's all so confusing. Then you hear how many people are getting divorced these days (50% or so) and it's discouraging. I don't mean to sound negative but my experiences lately have made me that way. Where is that 1 special girl out there for me?

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