Confusedashellmyself Posted June 30, 2008 Share Posted June 30, 2008 How true, anyone feeling the results > Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Confusedashellmyself Posted June 30, 2008 Author Share Posted June 30, 2008 you will never know the ifull npact you are having on an ex unless you let them feel what it is like to know what life is without you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nearwater Posted June 30, 2008 Share Posted June 30, 2008 ask me in 2 months Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alphabetsoup13 Posted June 30, 2008 Share Posted June 30, 2008 ask me in 5 years Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ccali78 Posted June 30, 2008 Share Posted June 30, 2008 My ex has been without me for almost 3 months he has not started dating yet and I do not think he will soon, but he is also fine without me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrokenDuc Posted June 30, 2008 Share Posted June 30, 2008 dont get complacent there is always someone else that can and will fill your shoes... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DJC Posted June 30, 2008 Share Posted June 30, 2008 dont get complacent there is always someone else that can and will fill your shoes... You always this positive? Back to topic, yeah ask me in a few months-not even been 2 weeks NC yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IMAbadman Posted June 30, 2008 Share Posted June 30, 2008 It's been 2+ months since I heard from my EX. Well other than somewhat of a blow-off text, “Sure we can talk sometime”, after I initiated contact first. Quite frankly I’m sure she’s getting along just fine without me. She has her kids for daily support. Not being pessimistic… just honest the way I see it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Comeback_Kid Posted July 2, 2008 Share Posted July 2, 2008 Yeah, its been 11 months with my ex and shes fine looks like... * * * * why am I still on here? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mustang Posted July 2, 2008 Share Posted July 2, 2008 There is no guarantee. I think the only way that NC and the "letting your ex miss you" idea will only happen if the ex wasn't 100% certain about breaking up with you. But for somebody to break up with somebody it takes a lot of courage and they won't do it on a whim. It seems common that a dumper will spend a lot of time thinking about it before doing it. That said, maybe when the dust settles and both people move on... MAYBE one day old memories will come to the surface. Whether or not the dumper acts on them is another matter. My ex could miss me right now but I won't know about it. At the end of the day, it's all about how the other person feels. Yes, we can look at lessons we learned from the relationship and improve ourselves but you can't change FREE WILL. I just don't want to see people doing what I was doing... forcing yourself to move on as a way of saying "if I move on, then my ex will come back". Wrong move. It is easier for me to say this all now having come out of the other side. Trust me, I handled my break up in the worst ways possible. I let false hope get the better of me and this made me frustrated when something didn't happen the way I wanted it. I wasn't my real self. Everything I said and did was to try and make my ex come back in some way - either directly or by hearing what I was up to from other people. All I have learnt in the past eight months or so is that, as cliched as it sounds, if it is meant to be it will happen naturally. I don't wish to sound negative, I do believe that there is always a chance and I know that everything is possible to be worked out if both people are willing but I think this takes time. Honestly, I can sometimes see myself and my ex together again and I do still care about her - but I'm not living my life trying to change somebody's mind anymore and when you can let go of the hope then you are probably much closer to becoming the real you again and THAT is the one thing that probably gives you the best possibility of getting an ex back and as we have all seen on here before, it's often when we are truly over them and are living life that they come back... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IMAbadman Posted July 2, 2008 Share Posted July 2, 2008 I just don't want to see people doing what I was doing... forcing yourself to move on as a way of saying "if I move on, then my ex will come back". Wrong move... Mustang... come on now be honest. Read your previous posts. You stayed in limited contact with your ex, played the friend thing, hung out with her, and knew she had a boyfriend. Buddy you constantly put yourself in harms way with her. When you didn't get your way you tended to go off on her. Ring a bell? Then as you hit rock bottom you started to listen to the advice of others on ENA. You're finally doing NO CONTACT with her now, RIGHT?!?! That means no contact what so ever? I hope your doing good and moving on with your life. And you know what... a little hope isn't bad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mustang Posted July 2, 2008 Share Posted July 2, 2008 Mustang... come on now be honest. Read your previous posts. You stayed in limited contact with your ex, played the friend thing, hung out with her, and knew she had a boyfriend. Buddy you constantly put yourself in harms way with her. When you didn't get your way you tended to go off on her. Ring a bell? Then as you hit rock bottom you started to listen to the advice of others on ENA. You're finally doing NO CONTACT with her now, RIGHT?!?! That means no contact what so ever? I hope your doing good and moving on with your life. And you know what... a little hope isn't bad. When I said I was forcing myself to move on I was... but I was lying to myself. I had a belief that if I moved on then my ex would come back. Which is false hope and it isn't really moving on because even if I stuck to NC (I didn't) I'd still be expecting/hoping my ex would come back and if she didn't I'd be upset and frustrated a few months down the line. Having any sort of thoughts about your ex makes it impossible to move on fully in my opinion. That could just be me. Maybe if I was more confident in myself I'd have been able to move on a lot sooner. I have no bad words to say about my ex. I could point the finger and say she didn't handle the break up very well, but then again, so could she. As time goes by, I'm sure we'll be actual genuine friends. Not the "friendship" that we had that had hidden agendas all over the place. I do really care about my ex and always will do. But I'm bored of waiting and trying to win her back. Life's too short. I have no more bitterness. Negative thoughts are bad for the soul. I have a lot of fond memories of my ex and always will do. I can see us getting back together one day MAYBE but right now, it's clearly not the right time for either of us. Forgive me for sounding like a hippy, I have been at Glastonbury for five days! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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