What's wrong with hurting yourself?

[Captain When]

I have my own answer to this question, but I'd like to get some of your opinions.

 

When a person is hurting his or herself in controlled, light, and non-fatal sort of way, (for whatever reason), is it still wrong?

[Russ]

Sure is.

 

It's not even about the physical damage. What it means is that there are underlying psychological issues. While they may be mild at first, they can turn very big and very serious potentially.

[ole21]

I think you need to elaborate a little, but yea I think so...it's just very self destructive.

[Aldo25]

It's not necessarily the act itself, but what it represents. If it's the only way you find you can cope with stress, than something is seriously wrong with your mental state.

 

I used to be a cutter, and I hated myself everytime I did it. I eventually got it under control to the point where I don't do it anymore (still think about it a lot though).

[CarnelianButterfly]

It's no different from the acceptable forms of self medication such as alcohol or drugs. It causes harm because isn't truly dealing with the issue, the emotions are placated for a little while, but the problem has not been resolved.

[girl friend]

Self-injury is NOT wrong. It IS a coping mechanism, one that many would insist has saved their lives at times.

 

It is a dangerous, maladaptive coping mechanism, but it helps the sufferer cope with emotions that they don't know how to deal with. I would never call it WRONG or bad, but i would urge the sufferer to seek help.

 

Dont fall into the trap of contemplacent thinking. You know what i mean? If you have tried and realised you 'cant' stop self-injuring, dont think 'well it doesn't matter, its not that big a deal,, i can just continue to SI for my whole lifetime, i should just accept it as a part of myself and move on instead of keep upsetting myself trying to stop..." etc. Don't./ Get a therapist or someone to listen, and explore why you cut.

 

girl friend

[Captain When]

Interesting replies, thank you for your thoughts.

 

I certainly agree that self injury is indicative of greater underlying problems.

 

I have used a number of mechanisms to cope with a very difficult life, including self injury, and heavy drug use. The combination of the two were not pretty.

 

(I think the release came from the lack of regard for my own life.)

 

Anyway, when I was a kid, I didn't see too much wrong with it. I found ti exceptionally useful. Though the extent to which I hurt myself grew as my situational problems did, and it was then that I realized the problem with cutting:

 

Injuring myself was an act, (and a reminder), of my own weakness. Indulging those feelings of weakness was necessary, but often masturbatory. To break from the prison I'd put myself in, I had to realize that I was powerful enough not to resort to acts of weakness.

[perfectliljewel]

It doesn't matter how "bad" your self injury is, if done for the same reason typically it only gets worse. Just like when doing drugs, you use more to get the same effect. It still hurts you emotionally, and in my opinion is equally as damaging.

[sarey]

Doesn't matter how severe it is, the fact you hurt yourself means you have a lot of emotional pain and it can get pretty bad as time goes on if you continue to do it. I used to do it shallow, but look at me now, I've got dozens of scars that will be there permanently because of how deep they were. It isn't wrong, it's a coping mechanism like Girlfriend said, but it damages you, it is very unhealthy to do and bad for you.

[EQD]

I dont think its wrong. i dont think any of it is 'wrong.'

who are we to judge?

People do what they do with their bodies and we shouldnt look down on them for it. (referring to self injury)

[girl friend]

Captain When i really respect that you beat it! Well done! Did u talk to a therapist or anyone? Incredible either way.

 

Thats interesting perfectliljewel. Some people's self-injury will never get too serious, at least not comparative to the extremes other people will push themselves too. though in general each persons gets worse and worse as the cycle of abuse progresses. I agree though, it is as serious to be coping in that way whether someone is scratching, or scarring themselves for life, or starving themselves to death. But i certainly would probably prioritise the people self-injuring to dangerous consequences.. mb thats wrong. I certainly think Prevention is important.. talking to kids about SI before they reach adolescence to teach them adaptive ways to cope and the hell that a cycle of SI will cause them in the long run.

 

Sarey thats great, don't you want to take that advice too ? about how bad it is and unhealthy. Is there other ways you can think of to cope with emotional pain? does everyone have emotional pain do you think?

girl friend

 

Thats great EQUESTRIANDYNAMO, v open minded. Noone should judge,but they do. I agree its nothing to look down on. But it is a maladaptive coping mechanism that needs to be stopped when the time is right for each person. too much lack of judgement can be confused with acceptance, approval even. thats what worries me. I mean, it is NOT ideal, in an ideal world our kids wouldnt have to cut themselves to cope.

[bijoux27]

I have no idea why it's wrong. Other than the fact that the physical scars will be there for a long time.

[The Joker]

I don't think there is anything wrong with self-harm morally.

 

However, self-harm can be very self-destructive, and I don't mean just by harming your skin. Most people who self-harm do it to distract themselves from their emotional pain. People rely on self-harm to make them feel better when they are depressed. When you first feel depressed and want to self-harm, you might leave an abrasion, on your arm, for an example. You would keep doing this to make yourself feel better. But, there will come a time when you become too depressed for merely abrasing yourself to feel better, so you might actually cut yourself and get it to bleed. Next time you get depressed, cutting might not help, and it will lead you to do something even worse, like burning yourself. Then, it might lead to drugs, and eventually, it would lead to suicide.

 

If you regularly self-harm, you will find that one way of self-harm isn't good enough, and you keep progressing to doing even worse things to yourself. You might get so depressed that suicide may seem like it's the only way out.

 

That's why I think it's bad..

[Ragdollwasteland]

Ever notice that the people who claim that its wrong have never tried it for themselves in the correct context and don't know the positive effects of it? And yet those same people light up a cigarette and do far worse to their insides than you do to your outsides and when they are asked why they smoke they say that it helps them with stress?

My theory is that people are scared of the self mutilation that they can see plus everybody sees in black and white and are told from an early age that its bad so they seem to think that things like cutting are bad... Guess what guys. Smokings worse!

[girl friend]

Ever notice that the people who claim that its wrong have never tried it for themselves in the correct context and don't know the positive effects of it? And yet those same people light up a cigarette and do far worse to their insides than you do to your outsides and when they are asked why they smoke they say that it helps them with stress?

My theory is that people are scared of the self mutilation that they can see plus everybody sees in black and white and are told from an early age that its bad so they seem to think that things like cutting are bad... Guess what guys. Smokings worse!

 

I agree!!

I often hear ignorent people saying stuff like "suicide is a sin." they have clearly never been in a situation where the emotions are so upside down and so desperate that suicide seems logical. Nor have they ever been in a situation with a loved one suffering in that way. Nothing is right or wrong. Where these feelings are concerned how could anything ever be right or wrong? It is all in one persons perception, which others may not understand.