Closure??? confused.

[poppie]

Has anyone else felt that they need closure over the break-up of their relationship, or more to the point thinks they do and then realises that they actually don’t after all.

 

You see my break up was just so stupid, all over in 30 minutes and I still don’t really know why. I have so many unanswered questions and they are just going round and round in my head and driving me mad.

 

After 10 days of no contact last night I left him a message asking him to call as I need an explanation in order to move on. He did call but I was out and left a message which I have to say was very cold and to the point (not sure what I was expecting) He said he would ring Saturday as his ship was at sea until then.

 

Today I send him a txt just to say don’t worry about ringing Saturday, that when his ship gets back in July I would speak to him then, that it was probably better left until then anyway.

 

Suddenly after 10 days of needing answers now I feel that in fact I actually no longer need them, I am hoping that by the time his ship gets back I will be in a better position emotionally to be able to say that I don’t need to talk and that I am in the process of moving on.

[soulalone]

Hi Poppie

 

Honestly you have come very far is realizing that you don't answers. The breakup is over and done with and you should know that closure comes from within you and you dont need answers from him. You need to know that A HIGHER power needed you to realize something about you.

 

The most important advice I can give you is....GET YOURSELF BACK.

[Keyman]

Closer is a personal thing, it has nothing to do with your ex. Asking questions of your ex does not give closure, if anything, it can open more wounds. Closure is something you decide to do for yourself. It's about accepting that the relationship is over, there has been a loss and moving on. It's closing off that part of YOUR life and get on with it. It's letting go of the questions and moving on.

 

Wanting to seek answers from the ex, is in a way trying to keep things going that little bit longer and having excuses to see them again.

 

Soulalone is right, the best advice is to begin the process of healing and to get yourself back. Don't give in to your want to see them.