Anon333 Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 I have an ex that put me through hell. Last year I was on this sight bleeding my heart out about how sad I was. The relationship was a mess from day one. He had a million issues, acted very controlling and verbally abusive, and we just butted heads like no tomorrow. He took the relationship so fast from the get go, saying he loved me, and then when I pushed him away, he jumped into a new relationship and married the girl within a month after breaking up with me. He really was pretty crazy, but I always had trouble with the way things ended and putting it all to rest. I have still been upset about how strong he felt for me one second and dropped me the next. I still always seem to be haunted by the hurtful things he said to me, just everything about the relationship seemed to dig really deep inside of me, even though it was a short lived relationship that never even had a honeymoon period. So he left me saying how wonderful and how much better the new girl was and got married on whim and moved out of town and we havent talked since. I have since gotten over him, and moved away myself, and dated someone else in between. I heard that the marriage was falling apart recently and he was in the middle of a divorce, which didnt really surprise me. anyway.. Recently he emailed me a brief note saying he was sorry for things that had happened in the past. That he was sorry if he hurt me and that it always kind of bothered him the way things ended, also that he understood if I didnt want to respond to the email, but just wanted to throw that out there. I emailed back a very brief friendly email saying it was in the past and dont worry and it was good to hear from him, to which he replied in a long depressing email about his life and how things are not easy for him now and where he was and what he was doing. So I responded about myself and what I was up to, another long email saying I was sorry about his hard time. He never wrote back, and though it initially bothered me a little, I put it in perspective that we should only be loosely friends and talking, and a cycle of emails could get bad anyway. Then he texted me the other day and we wrote back and forth a bit. The I texted him and he never responded, which once again irked me, as though I was just someone he randomly wrote to for an ego stroke when it was convenient for him...I kind of started to feel like I shouldnt respond to him anymore, or at least wait it out a bit before I do... So that was my decision, until he texted me today how it was his birthday and the anniversary of his engagement and how he was depressed. This bothered me, because his engagement marked my agony last year, yet I'd like to think that is behind me and doesnt bother me, and I dont like to hear people who are down especially on his birthday...So I wished him happy birthday and told him to go have fun. His texts pretty much turned into him saying he couldnt go on anymore. I dont know if he is suicidal or what. I told him not to do anything impulsive in his state of mind and that he should talk to someone. And now I havent heard from him. I know he has been depressed and I dont know how serious I should take him saying he wants to "give up". He is a very passionate kinda crazy person, he has ADD and just got diagnosed with bipolar dissorder. There is still some kind of sick part of me that cares about him and wants to be his friend, but I know it is unhealthy for me. Does anyone have any suggestions...Should I call him to see if he is okay? Or should I just let him deal with it, and I deal with my own problems. Besides his depression, should I even be friends with him? What do you think his intentions are. I kind of feel like his fall-back girl since his wife left him he is suddenly contacting me to feel out things. Not to be with me, but just for his ego to be stroked....I dont know...I'd feel horrible if he did something stupid though.... Link to comment
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