Godwin Posted June 23, 2008 Share Posted June 23, 2008 Do you find this to be true? Does it get easier the second/third time around? Personally, my experience so far has proved it to be true. Although since its only been 5 weeks I may be kidding myself. I am sure that I have dark times around the corner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rtoycrow Posted June 23, 2008 Share Posted June 23, 2008 I don't agree with that statement. The second breakup with my ex was just as hard if not harder than the first. We were together longer the second time though. Don't know if that has anything to do with it though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Godwin Posted June 23, 2008 Author Share Posted June 23, 2008 My first was just over a year (age 21). My second 6 years+ (age 29) I guess its impossible to know though. I am more mature now and can talk about it with my friends/family almost non-stop, previously I bottled it up and perhaps thats why it was so different. I also thought that we grew apart more in the latter relationship and given that we NEVER lived together and only saw each other twice-weekly it was always going to be doomed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rtoycrow Posted June 23, 2008 Share Posted June 23, 2008 I would think to a certain point seeing each other sparingly would make her want to see you more because she would miss u. Me and my ex were together pretty much everyday and she got bored with the relationship and left. Who knows. Relationships can be so complicated Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parsley Posted June 23, 2008 Share Posted June 23, 2008 Some ways I agree...but some ways I disagree. I was with my first boyfriend for 2 and a half years, and while it hurt a lot when we broke up, we weren't in love anymore and it was quite amicable. The breakup after that was gut wrenchingly painful. But while in terms of heartache the 2nd was harder - in terms of sadness the first was harder. He was such a lovely guy, and we're really good friends now, it was just so sad that we couldn't be together anymore and stay true to ourselves. The 2nd guy was emotionally abusive and I couldn't be happier that I'm shot of him!! But it's all so individual that none of us could answer this objectively. You might have dark times around the corner, but you've also got some fantastic times I promise. I just wrote a reply to someone else about when I first came here, for the 2nd break up. Back then, I'd spend a lot of time imagining myself a year from then, with someone new, and someone who made me happy. A year later I was happily settled into that new relationship, and couldn't be happier than I am now. Try it. It can't hurt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SchecterGuy Posted June 23, 2008 Share Posted June 23, 2008 Not at all for me. First gf was hard when I was 17. We dated for about 7 months but I guess you could say she was my first love. That summer sucked bad, but I did better when I went to college. Second gf I did not care at all when we broke up. It was another 8 monther. We basically just fell out of touch and did not bother reconnecting. This recent one is going to take a long time to heal. It was a 5+ year relationship. I do not have the college experience to take my mind off of things. And the dating pool in the real world as opposed to college is a lot smaller so the prospects of getting back in the saddle are a lot less. Even though this is my third breakup the hurt will not go away that easily on this one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Godwin Posted June 23, 2008 Author Share Posted June 23, 2008 Yeah, the dating pool is smaller for me also. Just had a look on a dating site and nothing even comes close to my ex. Fell really really sad now, she badgered me to get engaged for two years and I kept putting it off and off. I would literally cut my finger off just to spend a week with her now. I have told her that on numerous occasions and she just ignores my texts. Even offered to move away with her and give up my job. She doesn't want to know. I am really sad but not overally emotional and try not to think about her so much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrokenDuc Posted June 23, 2008 Share Posted June 23, 2008 the deepest cut is when you find out they are going out with someone else.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladyblue07 Posted June 24, 2008 Share Posted June 24, 2008 Even though my last breakup hurt a lot, in one way it was easier just because I knew that those feelings of "Oh no, I lost The One! I'll never find another one that great again!" and all that jazz would fade in intensity with time. It helps you realize that even though you feel 100% convinced at the time that they were perfect and you'll never love again, you were proven wrong before and you'll be proven wrong again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rainz Posted June 24, 2008 Share Posted June 24, 2008 In my experience it's not true. I've had some very traumatc break up experiences in my life and nothing could have prepared me for the pain I experienced with my last break up, I could never have imagined feeling such pain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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