onmyownagain Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 Didn't think this would happen but I am seeing a solicitor next week and I am starting the divorce!! Fed up with all the threats from her about needing more money etc. from my and recently saying I can only contact her via a Solicitor. So I am getting control back and starting it up myself, sooner this is all over the better, just need to think of grounds now In the UK you need to wait two years unless you say unreasonable behavour, only been six months so need to think something up, sure Solicitor can help me there. Wish me luck!!! Link to comment
Portage Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 Yippppeeeeeeeeeeeeee, i'm proud of you. It is always the most difficult to make that first move. Just think how empowered you will feel and the waiting and wondering will resolve itself. Congrats. Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 The best of luck to you. I am sure your Solicitor will find grounds, probably Cruel and Inhumane treatment, or the equivilant to that in the UK. It's an ugly road in the states...hope it goes smoothly for you. My best, ~Allie Link to comment
Supa_gurl Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 Good luck. FINALLY you can get the closure you soooo deserve. I hope it is expedient for you as well. Link to comment
Whiskers Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 threatening behaviour is pretty good grounds XXXX Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 threatening behaviour is pretty good grounds XXXX that's what I meant by the "Cruel and Inhumane" treatment that is ground in some States in the USA. There has to be similar ground in the UK. Link to comment
Whiskers Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 yeah I guess this is the equivalent to what you were saying... Fact B. Unreasonable behaviour You must show that your spouse has behaved in such a way that you cannot reasonably be expected to live with him or her. Unreasonable behaviour is now the most common fact on which to prove the ground for divorce in England and Wales. In an unreasonable behaviour petition, the petitioner sets out a number of allegations against the respondent. These allegations might include references to excessive drinking or financial extravagance, for example; but it's worth bearing in mind that the court doesn't insist on really severe allegations of unreasonable behaviour in order to grant a divorce. Relatively mild allegations such as devoting too much time to a career, having no common interests or pursuing a separate social life may well suffice. Using mild allegations may also make it easier to agree the contents of the petition with your spouse before you issue it. Link to comment
CallingAllAngels Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 Thank you for that. I had no idea the laws in England, as I am obviously from the the USA. I just went through a divorce on the grounds of Adultry. Great info for the OP!!! Allie Link to comment
Whiskers Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 I worked in family law for about 4 years...have to admit I am somewhat disturbed by some of the stuff that went on in marraiges, but there was this one legal exec who is absolutely fantastic. She is so incredibly devoted to family law and sensitive that she is surprisingly inspiring. XXXX Link to comment
onmyownagain Posted June 22, 2008 Author Share Posted June 22, 2008 I worked in family law for about 4 years...have to admit I am somewhat disturbed by some of the stuff that went on in marraiges, but there was this one legal exec who is absolutely fantastic. She is so incredibly devoted to family law and sensitive that she is surprisingly inspiring. XXXX Hi, thank you very much for your input, I was hoping I could get away with saying something like she showed no affection plus always put her work or social life first. For example on her last birthday said she wanted to go out with friends and not be with me, after all it was her birthday. My solicitor has asked me to bring a list of grounds, so perhaps I had better get them sorted. Link to comment
hardcharger Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 >For example on her last birthday said she wanted to go out with friends and not be with me, oh you poor man! that must have been terrilbe to take. Link to comment
Whiskers Posted June 23, 2008 Share Posted June 23, 2008 Unfortunately, this isn't uncommon. I have heard of this happening a few times before...the spouse choosing to spend their birthday with friends instead of other half, it's also used as grounds for unreasonable behaviour. Sorry to hear about that XXXX Link to comment
lostandhurt Posted June 24, 2008 Share Posted June 24, 2008 Believe me when you start the END you will feel so much better know some finality is coming. Feels good to take control back doesn't it? I wish you the best. Remember she will be her own worst enemy if you let her. lost Link to comment
thejigsup Posted June 24, 2008 Share Posted June 24, 2008 Jeeze, please save me from a man who would divorce me for spending time on my career! How insulting! Link to comment
onmyownagain Posted June 29, 2008 Author Share Posted June 29, 2008 Wow, she got there first and has started it, oh well. Lots of nasty made up grounds and lies, doesn't really matter in the UK. Doesn't make a difference to the outcome of the divorce. She is going for everything she can think of including the shirt off my back She is in for a bit of a shock I think, my solicitor says the UK basically is 50/50 these days if both parties work etc. Not much longer now until its all over. Link to comment
lostandhurt Posted June 30, 2008 Share Posted June 30, 2008 Selfish people have ruined more marriages than we can count! lost Link to comment
John Bendix Posted July 1, 2008 Share Posted July 1, 2008 Lost, You know that I agree with you on this (as well as many other insights that you shared). The selfish, self-centered, self-involved, self-absorbed, or what else you want to call it, have burnt many, many relationships. To be accurate, they were hardly relationships when that partner decided that they were more important than anything in the relationship. It ceased to be a relationship at that point on. Link to comment
onmyownagain Posted February 14, 2009 Author Share Posted February 14, 2009 Hi All, Seems like ages since i've been on this site. Anyway, got a letter from my Solicitor, my decree nisi will be sorted on the 24th Feb which is, ironically, my wedding anniversary. Financially we are nearly sorted, she isn't going to get anything like she expected which is a real shock to her. Very odd. but I feel fine about it all these days and I am quite glad we are nearing the end. Link to comment
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