It bothers me that she doesn't want to be friends

[alphabetsoup13]

Here is my story:

 

Before my gf left me for another guy, we were best friends. We confided everything in each other and loved just talking to each other about our lives and stuff not related to our relationship.

 

I know a lot of you guys on these boards talk about your ex's wanting to remain friends with you. My ex has deleted me from her life and has no interest in remaining at least friends. I didn't ask to be friends (and i don't want to be friends), but it's really bothering me that she is so able and willing to cut me off completely.

 

I wasn't abusive and always treated her right, but am i really that forgettable? It lowers my confidence so much to think that someone who had been in love with me for so long can just forget about me so easily...

[agent1607307371]

It's not that you're forgettable, or that it's easy for her to do, but that in the long run it's easier on her not being in contact with you - then she doesn't have to think about it.

[Whiskers]

It sounds like you're a kind and decent guy who has been shafted by a girl who thinks she can do what she pleases with no consequences. Not only did she leave you harshly, but hooked up fast and blocked you completely out of her life without so much as a "it's was nice while it lasted"

From what I read it sounds as if you had a good relationship but she didn't have it in her to at least be honest with you about her new relationship...it's likely she stopped being your friend on facebook for fear of you knowing what she would soon be getting up to.

I personally (and I have a streak of steel in me) would cut her out completely and when she stumbles face first into the dirt, I wouldn't be even remotely interested...however, you don't appear to be the kind of guy who can do that.

 

So here's your confidence boost; you sound lovely. Any girl would be lucky to have someone as thoughtful and as caring as you and sooner or later, the right girl is going to find you and leaving you devastated is that last thing she'll want to do. Not only are you going to come out the other side of this, you are going to have everything you want. You'll feel good about yourself for not treating your ex as badly as she treated you.

 

XXXX

[Cognitive_Canine]

It pains her less if she doesn't contact you at all.

 

You should make best of this situation and go No Contact right back.

 

I know it's hard to lose your best friend and SO in one fail swoop but the sudden act of forgetting actually shows that she does care about you, in a weird way.

[alphabetsoup13]

losing my best friend definitely hurts the most right now, but even if she wanted to be friends i don't think i would be able to.

[Ellie2006]

It's not that you're forgettable, or that it's easy for her to do, but that in the long run it's easier on her not being in contact with you - then she doesn't have to think about it.

 

I agree with Agent; more importantly, it will be easier on YOU in the long run as well.

 

This may not be what you want to hear (sorry) but even if you are able to remain friends, the friendship wont be at the level that it was before and that might end up being even more hurtful ...

 

Let things go for now and just bc you let go now, it doesnt mean you're letting go forever. At a much later date, maybe you two -- as two people who've grown during their time apart and yet with a common history that can be binding -- will be able to salvage a much healthier friendship for both of you.

 

Hang in there.

[BeStrongBeHappy]

People can be quite selfish when in the grips of a new love/infatuation. And if the new love is the jealous type, he may encourage her to cut all contact with you.

 

But i agree that if it is over, it is best for you to move on. It will only torture you to watch her getting close and falling in love with someone else. If he's just a flash in the pan, she may be back, but you had best must move on with your life since she seems to have moved on already.