Mustang Posted June 20, 2008 Share Posted June 20, 2008 ...I am fine with it. Allow me to explain: As most of you are aware, my ex and I don't see each other and we are nothing more than "text friends". Which isn't what I want. Yes, I regret our break up and I do miss her but I am no longer trying to win her back. I accept the situation for what it is and every day that passes is a lot easier. Anyway, seeing as we never see each other, I thought I'd give her a "test". My ex has had plenty of chances to tell me that she doesn't want to talk to me and she's always kept me hanging around in her life. I have no idea why anymore. I'm going to Glastonbury next weekend. So is she. So I sent her this text: "Hey hey! Seeing as we're both in the same Somerset fields next week, how's about a quick catch up? x" I really do hate the awkwardness that exists now. I just think it'd be cool to meet up for a bit, have a drink and clear the air. Texting is only 20% of a conversation. Without body language, eye contact, tone of voice, etc it's very easy for things to become distorted. I really do value my ex as a person and I really hope to become friends with her. I love her and I miss her but at the same time, I find myself looking at other girls now and I do feel ready to start dating again. No reply as of yet but I'm really not THAT bothered either way. To be honest, when I sent it, I actually got a bit nervous about what I would do if she said yes. So with that in mind, her ignoring me or telling me no is what I expect to happen. But the reason I did it was firstly to get it out of my system now. If I did it next weekend then it might ruin my weekend. At least this way, I have a week to put it behind me and go to the festival and have a great time - which I will do regardless. Secondly, it also gives me an answer without me having to ask the question. My ex said when she broke up with me that she didn't want to lose me completely. She said she still thinks of me. Whenever I've said that maybe a friendship wasn't going to work she would text me something unrelated as if to say "I still want you there". If she can't even be bothered to meet me for a quick drink when we're both in the same place for five days then I will know that all I will ever be to her is a person that lives in her phone. Do I want to be that person? No. It will give me the closure I need to move on. And that's without her at all. I really do hope to be friends with her one day but she seems to be scared of something. She says that she wants to be friends but she doesn't act like it. I have no idea why. Yes, I made all the mistakes that dumpees make. But I'd like to try and put all that behind us. It's not possible to do without seeing her in person. I honestly don't care if she's with someone else. I expect her to be. I've have long enough to deal with everything. But I hope she has the decency to tell me she doesn't want to meet up. She won't. I know her. She'll just ignore it. If that's the case, I can see that she doesn't value my friendship and she is not worthy of it. I know people have said that she isn't worthy of it anyway but I needed "proof". What sort of "friend" would blatantly ignore an offer of a quick meet up? Do I want to be a person that has a text friend? I'm not a child. I'm a grown up. I hope to build bridges with my ex and move on. I want to put everything in the past. I know I am capable of doing so. She seems to not want to and instead of facing up to things just runs away and hopes the problem will sort itself out. Which I guess it will do. I'll walk away and never bother her again. And she'll be able to say "Well, I wasn't horrible was I?" Cowardly or what? Link to comment
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