how much is to much?

[nmarchildon]

when i am away form my boyfriend i get this creepy feeling inside, like if we aren't together i'm missing out or i wake up alone in the morning and i can't help but wonder if he is forgetting about me, or enjoying his freedom to the point where he wouldn't want to hang out as much.

 

this of course never happens and i have no reason to feel this way, he is a good boyfriend and we love each other and he calls when we aren't together.... i just wish i wouldn't feel empty when he is not around. And its weird to because sometimes we are together so much that we start to fall on each others nerves?

 

and this makes me wonder... does he love me less? would we love and appreciate each other more if we didn't spend as much time together?

Help.... I love him and just want to be around him, my feelings are confusing me.

[pilotguide]

heya nmarchildon, i know EXACTLY how you feel. I have the same dilema with my girlfriend, everytime im not with her, i feel like maybe shes having fun with friends or enjoying herself without me, and i really feel left out. Everything you say applies to me too, we both love each other very much and i have no reason to feel this way, but like you said i also feel empty when shes not around Although this might not apply to you, the reason i think im having this feeling is that ive become to obsessed over her, i recently posted a msg about this (the obsessed article) and the advice i received was to do other things that would take my mind off her, such as sports or games or watching a movie or something. Though it has not fully worked for me yet, i am feeling abit better.

hope this helps

 

oh, and one more thing that might help, i think that like me, what you're feeling is paranoia "does she like me anymore? is she having too much fun with her friends and forgetting about me? why hasnt she msged?" etc, and like me it gets to me a lot, but then i think about it from another perspective, maybe i AM being too obsessed, maybe my feelings for her have made me lose track of whats really importan. The truth is, like both of us know, if our g/f b/f loves us very much and we in turn feel the same, then these feelings are just false impressions made by our mind. As time goes on, i think you'll get used to it think "hey, this isnt so bad, i can live with it"

[nmarchildon]

hey pilotguide,

 

you know i think you are pretty acurate, like i know he is thinking of me and probably talking about me to a certain extent when he goes out, but i feel like all i need is him. this is not true, and here is were i forget what is important. he has become my first priority, and im not even sure if he considers me his first priority, because he thinks of himself in all of this. which is something that i am slowly learning.

 

its the worse when i miss out hanging out with friends just to wait for his phone call. sometimes minutes pass so slow.... when really i should be out having fun and not agonizing over being with him when we are usually always together anyways. man..... i love this guy. i just want to be the perfect girlfriend.... and i think that means space for both of us once in a while.... i just don't want him to get more comfortable with his space than with me. maybe i am paranoid to a certain extent.... but then i tell myself surely we are not travelling around the world for a year together for nothing.... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh i hate thinking .... my thoughts are everywhere

 

my question to you is: is this your first relationship....? because this is mine. i feel lost sometimes because i haven't been through this and he has had a long term relationship before so he has a better grip on things

[Darknova12]

hey...

 

 

I know your questions already been answered, but I hope you dont mind if I add my 2 cents. I know how you feel, somtimes I get that feeling even when its not dealing with a girfriend, I think its just a natural feeling of being "left out". For example, when you see all your normal friends having fun without u, even if you were invited but couldent make it, you feel sad because you missed it.

 

I dont know if that made any sense , anway, I would just take a moment and calm down, and think about what your going to do with your boyfriend next...if the feeling builds to the point where you cant handle it, call him and talk to him.

 

Hope i've helped

 

Darknova

 

PS -- Dont alienate your friends, just waiting for his call, its important to maintain all aspects of your life, trust me I found this out the hard way.

[pilotguide]

yes, this is my first relationship, but its not my girlfriend's first either