I want my ex-gf back. I realized things...I love her. HELP !

[Blue Knight]

My girlfriend and I were going steady for 3 years and 6 months. If I am mad I usually scold her. She thinks that almost the span of that years she's the one who keeps on running after me. I was the first one who touched her and she said that I'm the one who she wants to marry. We have plans for the said event in the near future. She was in love at that time to me and her world revolves around me. Now, after 3 years and 6 months we had a fight and I didn't call her for 3 days. The next thing she said that "I'm fed up and I can't continue this anymore."

 

Now, I am very afraid to loose her and I've realized things that she did everything for me. I want to save money for that wedding day but she said...not now. She said let's be friends. I'm still thinking about the things she said about the plans. I know it was my fault and I thaught her to be that way.

 

I am in deep trouble and I want to court her and still loving her even she don't love me anymore that much. She said she still love me and care for me but not that much unlike before. I am willing to sacrifice myself just for her and I know that she's the right one for me.

What are the steps I should do to get her back at my arms without forcing her?

I can't sleep and eat. It hurts because she wants to get marry since we were still together. I think frustrations and my bad attitude drawn her to her situation where she said "I fall out of love from you". My God ! I almost thinking about ending my life. I love her..I wil do anything just to get her back. PLease ! Help !

What are the things I should do?

 

 

the scary thing is that I feel she is not interested to me anymore because she said it feels good to be a single. i know her friends are also influencing her and she said that she still doesn't know when if ever she will feel that she still wants me back. Her job as industry manager is also a hindrance to miss me. I know she's been dating group of friends. We broke-up since October 29,2003 and i am afraid she will no longer come back to me. Do i have to send her sms everyday ? I seldom call her too. Is it ok if I send her 3 white roses on christmas day ?

By the way , yes we still communicate with each other and she said "let's be friends first this time." Do i have to give her the wjite roses on christmas day ?

My friend who is a psychic told me she will never go back to you again because she's tired and mad to you. the only reason why she still talks to you is because you once were part of her life. Do I have to believe my friend ? I am too afraid. I keep on praying that someday she will be here with me once again. She said i should stop presuring her...but what if she finds another guy ? Oh no !. She said she already get-over with what was happened between the two of us.

[Boromir]

Whow- you are definitely dealing with a lot of questions at once. But that is okay, six months ago I went throught the same thing, and only recently was I able to put things behind me and move on.

 

This women is saying some of the things I heard too. When a women is happier at the moment being single rather than being in a relationship, I don't think there is much you can do. I wouldn't put to much into what your psychic friend said, but lets play it safe and say what he/she said is true. Now what? Well, whatever you do, don't hurt yourself. You might think in some way that it will show her how much you cared for her, but in reality she'll get over it and move on with her life, much like she is doing now. Don't waste your life on something that isn't worth it.

 

If she comes back in a few months and you still want her back, then cool. You may realize that all this wasn't worth it and not worth repeating. I have learned that all the advice you will get in this forum about what to do for yourself right now is very true, so read up on what other people are writing about and try not to just focus on what you are going through. Try to give some advice to other people, it will help you too.

 

This might sound harsh, but I don't mean it to be. I say this to myself too, and I was devastated once enough to try and hurt myself. There are people going to bed at night starving all over this world. I imagine the fact that we are all online at the very least we are doing well enough to have a roof over our heads and eat three meals a day. The point is that regardless of how bad you are hurting right now, many other s are doing worse and have not given up. Toughen up a bit, it will only help you, and may show her you are a rock, and not a basket case. Women want men, not boys. I don't think she'd come back to you if she felt the only reason for you to go on is for her.

 

Meanwhile, look around. . . there are lots, and I mean lots of beautiful women in this world. I used to live in South East Asia so I know Manila, and I know there are a lot of philippino hotties there. Take it easy, take some deep breathes, eat right even when u don't want to, take your vitamins, go out with the boys, and chill. If she comes back it is because she wants to. If she doesn't, then don't waste your time on it. definitely don't buy her flowers right now if she is saying she doesn't want a relationship with you. Save the money for someone that does.

 

I know all this is easier said than done, but considering I went through somethign similar as you and I got through it, what I say should mean something.

 

Take it easy and keep your chin up.

[Boundaries]

Her boundaries are probably up and she is being self protective.

[Blue Knight]

 

 

 

exactly ! i like the way you post your reply. it takes time to earn the respect and trust because it took her long to make a decision to cease the love. I will just pray to the Lord for some guidance and i will do the works. I Hope God will bless me on this.