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Girlfriend and eye contact with other guys...


netman

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I just want to vent a little. It pisses me off when I'm walking with my girl and she makes eye contact with every guy that passes by. And when we're sitting in a restaurant or anywhere in public, she has to make eye contact with every guy that sits near us or passes by. It annoys me, because I know how guys think and they love it when they get a girl (especially when she's with her guy) to make eye contact with them; it's sort of empowering to them. I believe that browsing at other guys is not all that bad and that's a separate issue, but I'm talking specifically about making eye contact with every guy that passes by. It's 2 different things. Looking at someone doesn't really mean anything to me, but most guys interprate eye contact as a sign of interest.

 

If you're a guy, picture yourself walking with your girfriend, and a guy is walking towards you and he looks at her (which is fine) and then she looks at him (which is fine too) but then she makes and holds eye contact with him, and then the guy looks at you with a smirk that has (yeah, I got your girl looking at me, you punk) look on his face. It bugs the hell out of me. She's very good looking, so I can handle guys looking at her, but the eye contact? I don't know.... I've mentioned this to her, but she acts like she doesn't know what I'm talking about and she accuses me of being jealous and insecure.

 

I know the first thing some of you will say is that she's right about me being jealous and insecure, but I think it's beyond that. I know this may sound like irrational jealousy or childish, but I've been with a lot of females, and I've never ever been through this before. I know that when I'm with her, I'm super consious about not making eye contact with other females.

 

I know I might get flamed here, but should I consider this lack of respect on her part, or am I just making a big deal about nothing? I'm doing way better about my insecurities and everything else, but these types of situations make me feel like I'm taking one step forwared and two steps back.

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Netman,

 

Once you told her this bothered you she should have made a twinge of an attempt to control her own eyes. If she can't do this for you after all you and her have been through then yes it is a sign of disrespect. I don't like this one bit. It is almost like she is flirting and trying to make you jealous. On occasion I would act as If I didnt even notice she did it. Then I'd even do it myself. She will not like it when you do it and then you can say "Well now you know how it feels". Don't be afraid to stand your grown. She may need a bit of a wakeup call. If she is gorgeous and she chose you then 9 times out of 10 your no slouch either. Give her a reminder that she's not Gods gift to the world, and you too, can still pull women if you had too.

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you MUST look at other girls and make eye contact with them IN FRONT OF HER. This will correct her.If she complains, tell her you're doing the same as hers. It will work.And if doesn't, leave this woman.The problem isn't you.The problem is that she doesn't have self confidence enough and wants to prove her attractiveness through other guy's eyes.

Luck.

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Teacher Paty,

 

Man, you really made me happy when you broke it down like that for my buddy netman. SO I need to hear more. Are you saying that people who do this Men/Women are trying to boast there egos. If so, then you may be one of the few people who has helped me see things from a different point of view on this subject.

 

Please go into more detail about this...Ok...

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I feel the exact same way about my husband as you do about your girl. I could have written that exactly the same word for word. I want to think about the issue a little more before I can word it out to you properly. If nothing else write me a pm to let me know how things are going, I may be able to update you with some specific steps that you can take to ward off this issue.

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There's nothing wrong with a woman wanting to feel pretty, sexy, desireable. But when she's making eye contact with other men while in your presense is ignorant and disrespectful. You can't change the way people think and feel. I wouldn't even try to. Or say anything to her. I'd dump her and find someone who makes YOU feel good about being with her.

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  • 13 years later...
I just want to vent a little. It pisses me off when I'm walking with my girl and she makes eye contact with every guy that passes by. And when we're sitting in a restaurant or anywhere in public, she has to make eye contact with every guy that sits near us or passes by. It annoys me, because I know how guys think and they love it when they get a girl (especially when she's with her guy) to make eye contact with them; it's sort of empowering to them. I believe that browsing at other guys is not all that bad and that's a separate issue, but I'm talking specifically about making eye contact with every guy that passes by. It's 2 different things. Looking at someone doesn't really mean anything to me, but most guys interprate eye contact as a sign of interest.

 

If you're a guy, picture yourself walking with your girfriend, and a guy is walking towards you and he looks at her (which is fine) and then she looks at him (which is fine too) but then she makes and holds eye contact with him, and then the guy looks at you with a smirk that has (yeah, I got your girl looking at me, you punk) look on his face. It bugs the hell out of me. She's very good looking, so I can handle guys looking at her, but the eye contact? I don't know.... I've mentioned this to her, but she acts like she doesn't know what I'm talking about and she accuses me of being jealous and insecure.

 

I know the first thing some of you will say is that she's right about me being jealous and insecure, but I think it's beyond that. I know this may sound like irrational jealousy or childish, but I've been with a lot of females, and I've never ever been through this before. I know that when I'm with her, I'm super consious about not making eye contact with other females.

 

I know I might get flamed here, but should I consider this lack of respect on her part, or am I just making a big deal about nothing? I'm doing way better about my insecurities and everything else, but these types of situations make me feel like I'm taking one step forwared and two steps back.

 

Netman,

 

Once you told her this bothered you she should have made a twinge of an attempt to control her own eyes. If she can't do this for you after all you and her have been through then yes it is a sign of disrespect. I don't like this one bit. It is almost like she is flirting and trying to make you jealous. On occasion I would act as If I didnt even notice she did it. Then I'd even do it myself. She will not like it when you do it and then you can say "Well now you know how it feels". Don't be afraid to stand your grown. She may need a bit of a wakeup call. If she is gorgeous and she chose you then 9 times out of 10 your no slouch either. Give her a reminder that she's not Gods gift to the world, and you too, can still pull women if you had too.

 

you MUST look at other girls and make eye contact with them IN FRONT OF HER. This will correct her.If she complains, tell her you're doing the same as hers. It will work.And if doesn't, leave this woman.The problem isn't you.The problem is that she doesn't have self confidence enough and wants to prove her attractiveness through other guy's eyes.

Luck.

 

Teacher Paty,

 

Man, you really made me happy when you broke it down like that for my buddy netman. SO I need to hear more. Are you saying that people who do this Men/Women are trying to boast there egos. If so, then you may be one of the few people who has helped me see things from a different point of view on this subject.

 

Please go into more detail about this...Ok...

 

My girlfriend is the same way it's a shame and it's embarrassing attention whoring has it's limits some women are desperate and have to go extra miles because they feel that is the only way that they can be relevant and interesting you don't matter in the seconds between the times that's she's attempting to grab some guys attention or the good impression she's tries to leave when she walks away from the individual this usually stems from her childhood feeling unconfident unwanted or unloved or abandoned as a child can cause A woman create these situations to remind themselves that there no longer the ugly duck or unloved by boys dumped for the more pretty ty women or abandoned by daddy daddy issues

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