the girl I liked and...saw her again

[siefer]

I got fired from my job back in sept. This girl I knew at my work lived in another town that I did. She was known to be a huge flirt and she is extremely attractive. Back in april when I was working there, I invited her to a party. She said to call her. I did and she never answered her phone. Then A WEEK LATER she calls me and says that she had family problems that night and she left a message saying, "I totally did not mean to ditch you. Call me back when you get this." I did and I went out with her and a friend of mine. Then a month later, I asked her to go to 6 flags with me and 2 of my friends. She agreed and we went. It went pretty well I thought. (this was back in the summer.) Then about 2 weeks later, I asked if she wanted to go to a concert she said yeah, but she was going out with her family that day and she's call me when she got back. She didnt call me and I ended up calling her and she said she was still out with her family and I should just go to the concert. When I saw her at work, she'd go on break with me, but she'd go on break with other guys also. She'd always start a conversation with me. She was very outgoing. When I was fired, the thing that bothered me the most was thinking that I'll never see her again. So, I called her after I got fired and asked if she wanted to do something, she said she was out getting ready for homecoming and she'll call me sometime when she can do something. Of course, she never called. It hurt me, but I eventually got over her and just accepted the fact. I got a great girlfriend now and I was starting to be happy. I got a new job and everything. Then, just yesterday (two months since that last phone conversation), I was on the road and that girl was right next to me on the road. I didnt notice her, but she called me on the phone and left a message to me saying, "I saw you on the road. It's been awhile since I've talked to you. Thanks for calling me. When you get this, call me back." I still havent decided what to do. I havent called her back. When I heard her voice again, I realized I wasnt over her. I've liked her for a year...and I thought I was through with her, but Im not anymore. I have a girlfriend now, which makes me feel so incredibly guilty, but I have the strongest urge to see her again. What do you guys think I should do. Please help me

[Beec]

You should not feel too guilty for wanting to see her again or even for talking to her. It's natural to want people other than your girlfriend, significant other, wife, husband, boyfriend or whatever. It's nto good to go out with her again, if you have a girlfriend or whatever, especially if your relationship is exclusive. If you think it's exclusive, then it probably is. What should you do? Stay with your gf unless you have a reason to break-up, which it seem you don't. See the other only if you can keep your hands to yourself. Don't try to move that relationship past "friends" unless and until you breakup or agree to have a more open relationship, which means you are breaking up but not in so many words.

[The Morrigan]

If you think you can get in touch with her without bringing up feelings that could hurt your relationship with your gf, then there's no harm in that at all.

 

If (on the other hand) you find yourself questioning your current relationship wondering about this girl, tread with caution. Either get back in touch with her with no other intention than being friends, or really think about how happy you are with your gf. If you find yourself thinking you'd like to get in touch to see if she'd show signs of interest, signs that if they were strong enough you'd consider getting out of your current relationship to pursue something - take a long look at the relationship you're in. I'm not saying you have to have declared undying devotion to the girl you're with by any means - but if you have a thought like that in mind, it would mean that somewhere in your heart you think you're with her while open to something better coming along, and to me, that means there's something lacking where you're at. And if there is, it's best to start thinking about it now, before you get in deeper. Before you end up between that "rock and hard place".

 

Just my two cents!