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Mixed feelings about not showing feelings...


Caldus
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I just don't know what is going on with me. It's hard to explain (and sounds quite rediculous), but I have a bad habit of never 'opening' up to anything or always asking myself 'why' before even doing anything; I want to be more sociable and live life to the fullest, but I keep telling myself if I try to be more sociable, then I will be made fun of my many people. My roommate and other friends would think I am some kind of moron. I just know that they will say something very mean and something that will make me really sad for a long time (they seem to have that ability). Then I keep telling myself they aren't friends if they won't accept the real me. Something keeps pulling my feelings inside instead of to other people. I think it's just because I've been like this most of my life and it will be hard to change. Sorry for ranting about my feelings, but I guess it's good practice to do things like this in order to actually say some thoughts out loud for once.

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NEVER BE AFRAID TO BE YOURSELF. REGARDLESS OF WHAT PEOPLE THINK. EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT IN THERE OWN SPECIAL WAY THATS WHAT MAKES US ALL UNIQUE. IF PEOPLE CAN'T ACCEPT YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE THEN YOU NEED TO REEVALUATE YOUR SURROUNDINGS AND ASK YOURSELF ARE THESE THE PEOPLE I WANT TO BE AROUND. IF SO PREPARE YOURSELF CAUSE FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE YOU WILL BE LIVING A LIE.

 

 

RESPECTFULLY

A NEW FRIEND

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the biggest risk in life is not taking a risk. how will u feel when u become old and regret never opening up because you were worried what other were going to say? how badly will u want to beat that shyness (if it is shyness) when u realise most of your friends dont really know who u are?

 

I want to be more sociable and live life to the fullest, but I keep telling myself if I try to be more sociable, then I will be made fun of my many people

 

why can most people in the world, including these 'friends', be sociable and u are not allowed? let your real personality shine, bring it out and u will feel wonderful. people, including your room mates will probably like u more. why are u holding in such a beautiful thing? what is that something that is holding you back? is it bad experience, the past maybe? no one will think you are a moron for holding the real you in, infact you will attract more people when they see what a sociable person you are. how can you expect others to love you when you dont love yourself? i think that is the problem here. people who love themselves and let their personalities shine are the people who we get attracted to. no one will think you are a moron. u will gain more friends.

 

live life to the fullest because you only live once, and thats what i have learned. have no regrets. if u keep your self in, then who would have known what a great person you are? who would have remembered you for you, and not some undercover person who they thought was you. Caldus, the sooner you let the real you show, the more you will love yourself, the more friends you will get, and you will never regret it.

 

good luck, be your wonderful self and the world is yours

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First off dont apologize for saying how you feel, that's what this site is for,

is to get it all out. Well It seems to me you feel out of place and mind,

Maybe you shouldn't emphasize so much on what other people think,

instead try and focus on how you can feel better towards yourself, and

if people talk badly about you that you know maybe you shouldn't

associate with that crowd. If you feel self conscience about socializing maybe you should read up on books associated with social anxiety.

I hope your able to get past this rut you seem to be in, well good luck

and I hope everything works out.

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