am I conquest? Is he desperate?

[rainbow]

This is one problem I didn't expect. Three weeks ago I ended it with a guy I'd been seeing for a couple of weeks. I just wanna say that he was a nice guy. I broke up with him because we wanted different things. He said he didn't want a relationship (he said he liked seeing me though), I wanted a bit of commitment. I didn't want anything serious, but the whole not a relationship, no commitment, no hassle etc thing makes me feel used. Also there were things that really bugged me about the whole thing. 1) we'd never plan when to go out, he'd just phone me up at the last minute (usually late evening) and say lets go out and we'd go out for 2 or 3 hours, I've never seen him for longer than that. He just didn't have time. 2) we never talked, we talked but not properly. 3) He never seemed interested in me. 4) In addition I'm a virgin and he's slept with loads of people. Anyway after a while I just though this isn't what I want. So I ended, at first I was kind of relieved. As time went on I sort of began missing him and regretting ending it. It may have been cos I was single and bored. Anyway the other day out of the blue he calls me and acting as if we'd never ended it asked me to go out with him. I said that I cant cos I'm busy and he begged for a while. I said why don't you take some1 else. At first he said that he doesn't have anyone else to take and then said that actually he wants to see me. Then he said do you want to go out some other time. I said what's the point, things haven't changed bla bla and he didn't say anything. Eventually I told him we can go out some other time and that he should call me, he said he would. I don't know what to do???? Why does he wanna get back with me? Does he see me as a conquest? Is he desperate (cant find anyone else)? Or did I genuinely make an impression?

[elbandido]

Seems to me the guy doesn't really care much about you, especially when he told you that he didn't have anyone else to take out. Maybe he is seeing other girls at the same time wanting to be a player, but you shouldn't have to put up with it. Forget that guy. He is playing games and using you...calling you at the last minute, not wanting to talk to you, telling you you are not his first choice to take out. You are better than that -- how can I tell? Well, you are here hurting and trying to find someone to make you feel better while that guy is probably out there not thinking about you. Sorry to be so frank, but it just stinks when there's nice girls out there and there are jerks ruining things for nice guys! You have only seen him a couple weeks, that's nothing! Move on, find someone who will put you first, who will take time to call you and make plans with you and be excited about seeing you. This guy doesn't sound like a winner.

[Gilgamesh]

Hello rainbow

 

I gotta agree with ElBandido, he already told/showed you his real intentions. so whatever he says now, is just him trying to get the one that got away. you are a challange.

 

This isnt about love or commitment, which is what you want. the feelings you had for him, after you stopped seeing him, is just the "longing" for that love you would like to experience and receive.

 

Be true to your values, and dont settle for anything less, than what you expect and are comfortable with.

[angel02222000]

the guy is looking at you as a conquest i know cause for a long time i was that way. You can do much better and i am certain that you know this already it just gets lonely. believe you me i know the feeling. It'll all get better for you.