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Confused about my Sexuality

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I amd shy and suffer from social anxiety disorder. I've never been good at communicating with people and have few friends and have not dated much.


Lately I having gay fantasies. Not about anyone in particular but just wondering what it would be like to have sex with a couple of men. I've always considered myself straight and up until recently I only had been interested in women, but lately I have been fantising more about men then women. I am wondering if I am starting to become gay or maybe I have been gay all along and am just realizing it now. People have questioned my sexuality before, but I think that was due to me not dating much or maybe they knew something I didnt.


Any opionions or suggestions?


I'm trying to get in to see a therapist, but in my area there is a long waiting list.

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it could be that your just sexually curious, a lot of people experiance this through life and its not something that you need to worry about too much, as long as you are comfortable in yourself.

i wouldnt jump to the conclusion striaght away that you are gay, maybe you do have to socialize a bit more and see how you feel around different people.


for what reason did you mention going to a therapist?

does it scare you about having these fantasies or do you feel its natural?


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If you are fantasizing about something, it may just be to get you excited.


If you are interested in acting on the fantasies, then find out more about the gay culture in your area. There is a magazine called OUT that you may be interested in looking at.


Become a part of the culture and you may feel like you like it better than the culture that you are in now!

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  • 3 weeks later...

Tough one. Keep in mind that most people, at one time or another, fantasize about sexual things that they would never want to act on in real life. As a gay man, my own experience is that my first sexual feelings ever were directed towards males, and I've known on some level that I was gay ever since, even when I was young and didn't want to admit it to myself. I have a very hard time believing that any guy could be truly heterosexual with no homosexual feelings, and then one day just "become" gay. It's not like taking up a new hobby!

Heck, maybe you're recognizing the beauty of the male form and discovering a side of yourself that finds it sexually stimulating. I still don't think that makes you "gay." Just perceptive.

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