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I've been with my girlfriend for nearly a year now. Our anniversary is coming up in a few weeks and we're taking a trip for it. We've had our ups and downs but we've worked on it together and at the moment everything is great.


I'm happy, but there is just one problem, it's not enough!


I'm only 22 but I really want to get married and have children. Not right away but I want it to be on the cards at some point. The thing is, my girlfriend has said she doesn't want this stuff yet, and wants her career to get sorted first before she thinks of this. Meaning that it'll be a long time before we consider doing any of this. Plus, she doesn't like talking about the future, it kinda freaks her out.


Now, I know she may not be the one for me, and that we probably won't have a happily forever after, but I do love her and she loves me. At the moment and for the near future, everything will be great.


But I can't shake this urge to get married and have children. I see married people with kids and I get insanely jealous. I just want to have that, and it's affecting me quite a bit. Am I weird? I mean I know I'm young and all. I'm so confused.

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nope not weird, but i can completely understand where she is coming from though, after i graduate from college this may, i really want to focus on my career for a while. i met my husband young and i had the same thoughts as you. maybe she wants to be financially stable before having a kid or getting married, which imo, is a good thing.

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My question is, what do you think marriage and children will bring?? Those people you see who are married w/kids most likely aren't living the "American Dream" with the white pickett fence, beautiful suburbs, stable job and a little brown puppy! They are probably barely keeping the marriage together, having financial difficulty and liviing on Section 8 and welfare.


Besides the marriage and children, what else do you see yourself doing? Are you on a career path? I personally think you should get on the path to a beneficial career, because once you're a parent, you can't give the children back as they don't come with receipts. Being a parent is a lot more frustrating than you may think. I'm not trying to lecture you or anything and I'm pretty sure you may know this, I just want you to take it slow and really think about all responsiblities marriages and children have, not to say that it's hard and stressful, because being married and having children is a blessing, but when the time is ready.


You're still young and have plenty of time to settle down, love your independence while you still have it!! Good luck in everything you do!

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I'm getting my career sorted now. I've got a decent job approaching as soon as I graduate from university. I know getting married and having kids now would be a stupid thing to do, and I know it will be a long while until I get there, either with my girlfriend or someone else.


But that still doesn't stop me thinking about it thats all, and knowing I may not have a future with this girl bugs me.

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